Wonderful World
by Zeff N Company
Summary: AU For Leon and Cloud, Cid Highwind was rude, offensive, never a good neighbor to have. But when bad things happen, there can only be compromises. An 'As Good As It Gets' parody.
1. Enter Mr Highwind

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**As a usual, I do not claim ownership for anything from Kingdom Hearts or As Good As It Gets. I am just another fanfiction writer trying to get by with four jobs and two to two and a half hours of sleep six days a week (why I love Sundays).**_

_**Apologies for any out of character actions that I may have slipped in.**_

* * *

This day that starts this story was like any other kind of day one liked; the air was cool, but there was no rain. The morning was setting in, but the rising sun's glaring rays weren't hurting anyone yet. It was one kind of day that people loved to go out on, to smell the flowers, watch the birds and just feel happy about living.

Well, most people, anyway.

"Get the hell away from there!"

A middle-aged blond man of an average height, straw between his lips and aviator goggles on his head, dashed out of the shop that read "Highwind's Repairs". In his hand was some rusty old gadget even he would not bother keeping. Waving it threateningly, he continued barking at - ironically enough - the little border collie pup not too far away.

"Go whiz somewhere else! Go whiz all over the city if you have to! Just leave my shop sign alone! Away from it, damn you! Get away!"

The little dog whine-grunted in puzzlement, then sniffed the post a little more. That same post that read "_Highwind's Repairs - ask for Cid Highwind and no one else_". Then it turned around and squatted.

"NO!" the man bellowed. Immediately, the dog's head snapped up to look at him in confusion.

"Stand up. Stand up now, come on."

The dog slowly moved to comply, then the look on its face showed it was not ready to wait any longer and it squatted again.

"That _does it_! You're dead, you badger-faced son of a bitch, you! You dog-faced badger! I'll fix your clock; I'll fix every gear!"

The puppy yipped as the man seized it by the middle and hoisted it up, showing a nice yellow puddle formed at one side of the post. Growling, holding the dog at arm's length, the man looked around desperately. Then he spotted a truck being fired up.  
"_S&R Recycling_".

"In ya go!"

With a startled yelp, the puppy disappeared into the paper bin, just as the truck drove off.

"This is Traverse Town; if you can make it around here, you can make it in any other shit dump. Good riddance!"  
Flipping a finger after the departing truck, the man walked back into his shop muttering about the yellow stain on his signpost.

Then he heard someone whistling. Not the happy, pointless kind - it was still cheerful, though - but the kind used to call for animals, usually dogs.

"Angelo? Angelo, here boy!"

"...aw, sheeeeeeeeeet..." the man muttered to himself, then quickly ducked for cover behind his desk. As he pretended to be studying some reports, another blond man entered the scene. The only difference was that this one was a little taller, much younger, and his hair was fashioned into a spike. He was also scanning the area and whistling.

"Angelo? Where are you, snookums?"  
Then he turned and looked into the shop. "...Mr. Highwind?"

The older blond man - now identified as Mr. Highwind the shop owner - slapped the papers down and glared at the younger man. "What the hell do you want?"

The younger man stopped and cleared his throat carefully. "Mr. Highwind, have you seen Angelo?"

Mr. Highwind's brows knotted. Rising from the desk, he stepped outside and faced the other. "...Cloud Strife, is it?"

"Yes?"

"Who, or what, is 'Angelo' supposed to be?"

Staring blankly in instinctive response, the man finally answered the question. "... You know, Angelo. My dog. Brown and white little border collie with an adorable little face."

Mr. Highwind snapped his fingers in understanding. "Oh! You meant your _dog_!"

"Yes, that's right; Angelo."

"For a minute there, I thought you meant your _other_ snookums."

Cloud's facial expression changed to one of confusion. "...'other snookums'...?"

"Long brown hair? Big ass 'love cut' scar on his face? Leather belt fetish?"

Cloud caught on at once, and he frowned. "You're talking about Leon. You know him, Mr. Highwind; Leon Leonhart. And it's not a fetish; it's just part of his personal style... I think you know that, too."

Mr. Highwind raised his brows this time. "..._do_ I, now?"

Cloud nodded, and cleared his throat again as his eyes flicked away from Mr. Highwind. "Yeah...he's also right behind you."

Mr. Highwind's expression changed and he backed into his shop a bit as another towered figure glared at him behind stormy blue-gray eyes and a fierce angry scar that ran diagonal across an uncompromisingly stony face.

"...well, good day to you; looking better than usual. Without all that leather."

"... ..."

Cloud decided to steer the subject away from the offence in time. "Did you find him, Leon?"

"No, and we'll probably have to give up for a while; the dealers are coming to see our work in half an hour."  
All while talking, the man named Leon led Cloud back down the street.

"As long as you keep your '_work_' behind a thick curtain and mute button, I have no complaints!" Mr. Highwind called after them.

Leon stopped and half-turned. His facial expression did not change, but the look in his eyes said enough.  
"...Cloud, why don't you go ahead-?"

"No, Leon, come on. It's not worth it; just let it go."  
A hand on the other's shoulder, Cloud turned him back again and they continued walking away.

"Hope you find your snookums! Love that dog!"

It was Cloud's turn to stop and look back.  
"...you don't love anything, Mr. Highwind."

Then the two turned and went up a flight of stairs, disappearing from sight. With a shrug, Mr. Highwind went back inside to resort his reports.

* * *

The first dealers were filling the apartment as Leon retreated to the washroom to cool down. In the living room, Cloud acted host as he talked to the more interested or sociable ones.

Where the spaces were not filled by mingling people, there were weapons. Swords, blades, guns, halberds, anything that had a surface. And on those surfaces were engravings, skillfully placed in to line the lengths. Each design was unique, yet all held a somewhat philosophical sentiment. These could be hero's weapons, had the timing been set a few thousand years back. Instead, now, they were being shown off to any man with enough wealth to take them into his collection.

Finally, Leon emerged with his more social presentation - still the same stony face with more receptive eyes - and came down to where Cloud was talking with what had to be their latest agent. Cloud spotted him in a moment and moved to let him into the conversation.  
"Leon, I'd like you to meet Andre; he'll be helping with our transactions with the dealers. Andre, this is my partner, Leon, who did the great job of placing the designs on every weapon here."

"Pleasure," Leon stated, shaking the hand in business manner. Etiquette was etiquette, no matter how many lousy agents there were in the world.

At that point, two shorter individuals came through the opened door and carefully made their way through the crowd.  
"Cloud? Hey, Cloud?"

Cloud turned and caught sight of them. Almost immediately, he started to step away. "Could you two excuse me for a second?"

Both acknowledged and watched him ease through the people and toward the pair.

"Sora! Riku! What brings you here?"

The shorter one - a brown-haired blue-eyed kid looking younger than he was - responded by holding up a messy looking Border Collie pup. The pup yipped gleefully.

"Angelo! Where have you _been_?"  
Taking the dog from the boy, Cloud started hugging and fussing over the little thing as it kissed his face feverishly. "My little boy, look at you! I was so worried about you!"

"We found him, Cloud," the brown-haired boy said, watching with accustomed casualness to the scenario.

"I know you did! We know you did! Where _was_ my little baby, anyway?"

"In our paper bin, eating out of a full diaper that managed to escape earlier notice," the taller, silver-haired boy answered without so much as twitching.

Cloud froze, then tentatively wiped at his face before inspecting the hand.

"Riku's kidding, Cloud. Really, he is," the brown-haired kid quickly reassured. Sure enough, the silver-haired one broke into a smirk.  
"It's funny, if you think about it. C'mon, we gotta get back to the truck."

"Say, guys, wait a minute."

The two boys stopped leaving and looked back at Cloud as he closed the distance between them. "...how did Angelo get into your recycling bin, anyway? He's kind of small, and even if he managed to get onto the truck..."

"Maybe some nice guy down a block or two dropped him in while we were making our rounds?" Riku offered.

Cloud fell silent. Right where he left him, Leon took that in as well, his eyebrows moving even more closer together, ever so slightly.

"...well, thanks a lot, you guys. See you around."

The boys said their goodbyes and headed back down the stairs and toward the waiting "_S&R Recycling_" truck. In a moment, they had driven off.

* * *

Down in the far back of his shop, Mr. Highwind was bent over a severely thrashed item that probably was a guitar in its past life. Or maybe a radio. It was hard to tell in its present state.

"...so if I can find the right one, I can cause it to produce sound again," Mr. Highwind muttered to himself, carefully, picking through those wires. "...let's see..."

_**Ring! Ring! Ring! Ring!**_

"Damn you all, what now?"  
Jerking away from the workbench, Mr. Highwind stormed up to the door and jerked it open, glaring straight at the face he had been expecting to show up.  
"_Yes?_"

Cloud blinked, then nervously coughed before beginning. "I found Angelo, Mr. Highwind."

"_So?_"

"Did...did you...do something to him, Mr. Highwind?"

"You realize I'm running a business here, my buddy boy?"

Cloud stopped and returned to being slightly taken aback. "...I'm sorry, what?"

"No matter what _time_ it is, or what _day_ it is, I'm _stuck here_, and I've got to listen to every _nut_ in the street _mewl_ about another scratched toaster, or another overheated waffle iron that they could have very well handled themselves. Do you know what I have to do about it? I have to _WORK_!  
"So do me a favor: don't touch that bell unless you're paying me for something to fix; not even if there is a fire, or a flood, or even a typhoon. Not even if you - or your fine _pussy_ over there - happen to become Traverse Town's first gay district leader, and you want to celebrate..."

"Mr. Highwind, we-"

"_Not even_ if you hear a pained scream and a thud, and there is red stuff seeping from under the shop door. _Not even_ if the smell of something returning to nature the long way is in the air, so thick that you can hardly _breathe_. _Not even then_; you don't touch this bell if you're not a customer. Do we have an understanding, sugarplum?"

"...yes, sir," Cloud finally managed to utter, nodding.

"Wonderful! Have a nice day."

Slamming the door, Mr. Highwind turned and walked back inside.

Cloud stared at the closed door, then turned and looked back at the silent Leon at the side.

"...well, at least we know each other's boundaries a bit better now, right?"

"... ... ..."

"I think I'll go back upstairs. Are you coming?"

"...you go ahead; I'll be right up."

* * *

"...let's see...if this wire is - by assumption - meant for the electricity input, then it means this one is...yes, I think-"

_**Ring! Ring! Ring-ring!**_

Slamming his tools back down on the table, Mr. Highwind thundered back out and threw open the door. "That does it! You've pushed my buttons, now, you pansy-assed little stool pusher, y-AAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Turning to the side, Leon slammed the older man into the wall with the red printed letters listing the paying rates for any number of items.  
"You think you can scare everyone, but you don't scare me; you're not even close."

"Don't touch me! I can sue you! Assault and battery! Criminal threatening! Weapon possession! They'll buy it all; you've got your scars, and I fix the judge's gas stove!"

"_Shut up_! Don't mess with me if you're not life-insured!"  
That shut the older man up for a second, but the younger was not done.  
"I come from _hell_! I know _twenty grandmas_ with more attitude than you! _So suck your own stupid eggs and enjoy them!_"

Then there was a tense silence as eyes bore into eyes, one man holding up another against a wall.

"...are you listening to me, Cid Highwind? Do I have your undivided attention, now?"

The man nodded quickly.

"Good. Now, I'll let you in on a little secret; you've got reservations made in Hades' resort. So if you ever touch that dog or verbally abuse Cloud again, I'll send you there on permanent vacation with no service charge. Do we have an understanding, grandfather?"

"Yes, sir."

"Wonderful. Have a nice day."

Releasing the older to land on the floor butt first, Leon turned and walked off, casually swiping dust off his hands.

"Leon?" Cloud could be heard calling down.

"I'm coming," Leon replied as he jogged back upstairs with a practiced light-heartedness, if only to keep the customers happy.

Cid Highwind remained sitting there on his butt at the side of his shop, staring after the man in shock as he registered what happened. Finally, taking in a few quick breaths, he got back up to his feet and walked carefully back inside.

At least he could try and fix that mechanism without any other disturbance, now...

* * *

_This spot will be reserved for post-story comments and answers to any reviews I might get. Oh, and if you haven't seen As Good As It Gets, don't worry; Cid's not a real villain. Trust me, just wait for the next chapters to unfold._

_Have a nice day._

_Sincerely,  
Pelz-Junge_


	2. Hail lil' Rookie

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**I'm considering taking out that bit about it being a parody; I'm changing quite a bit of plot here and there. Oh yes, and here's something for you: no Cid/Aeris. Sure, we know who's playing what, but these two FF7 characters aren't going to do that; think of all the factors!**_

* * *

The next day looked the same before, but now the sun was up in the sky, and the populace was already busy in the streets.

In "_Highwind's Repairs_", Cid was busy as well, working on a car someone managed to haul in through the garage door at the back.

_**Ring! Ring!**_

"Door's open! Come in!"

The door swung open, and a tall young lady entered. She had long brown hair and soft green eyes, and a lot of pink was visible on her clothing choices. In her hands was a lunch box with the words "_Cafe de Aeris_" stenciled in the side.

"Your lunch is here, Mr. Highwind," she called, setting the box down on the semi-cleared workbench.

"What took you so long?"

"Well, you insisted on having _me _bring it over instead of anyone else, and no one wanted to take your delivery, anyway. So you know how much you owe me, don't you?"

"Yes, yes; money's in the first drawer. And I want my change back," came the curt reply from under the pedestal-propped car.

The lady pulled open the drawer and counted out the right amount. "Don't worry, I'll give it to you...and you want me to unpack everything before I go, again, right?"

"Don't blame me for wanting assurance that everything I asked for is right there. Go on, name the suckers."

Shaking her head in amused resignation, the lady opened the lunch box and took out the food items one at a time. "One double bacon cheeseburger with extra bacon, one serving of sausage in cheese sauce, fries, and coffee with cream and sweetener. Anything missed?"

"Nope. And you can take that box back with you."

"You know, you're going to kill yourself eating food like that all the time," the lady commented, packing up the now empty box and the payment.

"Why bother with the shit skit when we all have to die someday, anyway?" Cid grunted, still under the car. "I will, you will, those pansies a block away will, their dog will, I hear your little adoptee will...we're all gonna drop someday and return to nature."

There suddenly fell an uncomfortable silence. Then the lady walked right up to the car and stopped only a few inches away from the man's elbow.  
"Get out from under there, Mr. Highwind, I want to talk to you."

"Can't you see I'm b-"

"_Get out from under there and let me talk to you, Mr. Highwind_."

Cid finally slid out, fidgeting a little under her cold stare as he kept trying to look away. Above him, the lady did not move.

"If you involve any of the children in one of your sarcastic remarks like that again, Cid Highwind, I'm walking out of here and never coming back. Do you understand? _Do you_?"

Cid continued to fidget.

"Tell me you understand or I'm leaving now."

"...yes. I understand, Aeris."

Nodding curtly, the lady picked up the box again and tucked it under her arm as she scooped up the money. "Your change is in the drawer; I'll be seeing you around."

Then she walked out and closed the door behind her, disappearing around the corner.

"...yeah. Yes, I'll...see you around," Cid muttered after her, then slid back under the car to resume working.

* * *

Nightfall. Along the streets of Traverse Town, a sleek convertible drove along, the rider looking everywhere while talking on a phone.

"...look, I already told you, I'm on a busy schedule... Yes, I know; I'll find you someone by the deadline, I assure you. Don't worry, you'll get the finest one I can come across. I'll get you someone who will stand out, do what you want without you even saying anything, I'll f-wait, wait, one second," pulling to a stop to let a little old lady get by, the driver suddenly caught sight of a familiar head of sandy-colored hair and a dirty gray trench coat. "...I think I found you a model; I'll call you back."

Clicking the button, the driver popped the phone back in his pocket and got out of the car. "Hey! Knight-boy!"

All heads turned in a group of straggling men, all rough and looking rather unkempt. Their obvious leader, a tall man with long silver hair, turned toward the sandy-haired one. "...do you know that man, Seifer?"

The man reflexively ducked backward as his boss' hand shot out to point. "Ah, yessir, Mr. Sephiroth! He bought me, Fuj and Raj here lunch a few weeks ago."

"And what's his name, boy?"

"I think it's Andre, sir...yes, it's Andre."

"Knight-boy, can you and your friends spare a minute?" the driver called again.

"Andre, is that right? Is that your name?" Sephiroth called back.

"That's right."

"What do you want?"

"My client's got some designing work due; I only need one guy."

Sephiroth guffawed. "..._one_ guy?"

"Yes, I need a pretty face...you there! Kid with the tattoo, come here; I'll give you the address."

A shorter blond young man with a tattoo across the side of his face pointed at himself in surprise. "...me?"

Disgruntled, Seifer slapped the shorter one on the shoulder blades sharply. "Go get 'em, Chicken Wuss. Go on, _go_."

Staggering forward from the impact, the youth jogged up to the car and the waiting driver. The driver nodded and pulled out a slip of scrap paper.

"Can you read, kid?"

"Ah...somewhat?" the youth answered quickly.

"Works for me; here's the details..."

* * *

"...yes, thank you... Zell Dincht...Z, E, double L, D, I, N, C, H, T, right? ... Pronounced what? 'Dink'? ...well, if that's what you say. Can he come, say...ah...five? Good, that's good. Thank you, Andre."

Leon looked up from polishing one of the unmarked weapons, the puppy watching him from a safe distance.  
"What was that?"

Cloud set the receiver back down in the cradle as he answered. "Andre found me a model; he's coming over at five. Will you be here?"

"I have to restock supplies, but I'll make it quick. Get out of the way, dog."

Sweeping a boot forward in a mock-kick, Leon sent the puppy happily yipping and hopping toward Cloud for attention. Cloud promptly reached down and scooped it up, fussing over it again.  
"Look at my boy! I know just what you want, Angelo, and I'm going to get it for you! That's right, baby!"

"Quit spoiling him," Leon called after him, checking the sights of a rifle.

"If I don't, he'll keep going to you," Cloud fired back from the kitchen. "I think Angelo goes for the strong, silent types."

"Whatever."

* * *

_**Ring-ring! Ring-ring!**_

Yipping excitedly, the puppy skittered across the flooring for the door, scratching at the floor and whine-grunting as the wooden barrier cut it off from the person on the other side.

_**Ring-ring! Ring-ring!**_

"Coming! I'm coming!" Cloud called, hurrying in from his studio in the back room, gently sidestepping the excited little critter to open the door. There, he took in the form of a shorter man, also blond, but with a long black tattoo gracing the left side of his face, and a pair of reinforced gloves on his hands.

"...ah, Cloud Strife, right?" the man asked tentatively.

"Yes, that's right; and you must be Zell Dincht." Swinging the door wider open as he spoke, Cloud admitted the other in. "You're early; I wasn't expecting you so soon, but everything's ready to go if you are."

"Yeah, sure, man," Zell answered casually, his wide eyes scanning the display still up of the weapons in their protective cases. His eyes soon came to a halt over a silver revolver with black engravings of a winged, horned humanoid lion lining the barrel.

"That's the Griever design; Leon's very proud of it," Cloud offered, coming back to where he was and picking up the gun for the other's closer inspection. "We call this one _Humbly Serving Victorious Leader_ - serve well he who embraces your grip, yet always lead him to the victories you bring with each bullet."

"Sounds almost romantic," Zell mused as Cloud returned the gun to its case.

"Yeah, well, Leon didn't really like it, but it sort of stuck after a while," Cloud admitted with a shrug.

"Who's Leon, by the way?"

"He's my partner; I dream, he materializes. Something like that, anyway... The studio's right here."

Following Cloud into a roomier space with a narrow, rectangular canvas on a pedestal to the side, Zell stared at everything carefully, then reached for the buckle of his pants.

Cloud turned at that point to talk further, then stopped and stared in confusion. "...what are you doing?"

Zell stopped with his belt in his hands. "Letting you draw me."

"This is not a portrait, Zell; it's a design. I draw from what emotions I can gather by just looking at you," Cloud quickly explained. "So you can keep your clothes on; I would prefer if you did, too, actually."

"Oh..." Zell slid his belt back into place and buckled up again. "No problem. Let's get started. So...ah...how should I pose?"

Cloud shrugged. "Anyway you like, I'll just watch until something comes up."

"How, man? I need some direction here! Give me something to work with! A theme!"

"Whoa! Whoa! Okay!" Cloud backed up a little from the highly emotional little man, then thought carefully. "Okay, let me see..."

With a sigh, Zell squatted on the floor in typical pugilist fashion, waiting.

"...a theme...hmm...let's see..." Then a light suddenly came into Cloud's eyes as inspiration hit him. "...beauty... Yes, I want you to think about a sword in a shop. Not just any kind of sword, but one that you really, really like. And upon the gleaming metal of that sword, there are engravings. The sword itself, you can find anywhere else, but it's those engravings; those carved markings on the blade that hold true all that you wish to convey, singing your life song while you wield that glorious weapon. It cries out your soul's emotions, says a thousand times more of words than you can ever utter in one lifetime... Beauty...the very essence of living and mortality."

Zell stared, mouth parted in silent awe as he absorbed what he had heard. Shaking his head, he propped his forehead up with a gloved fist. "...wow. You really should go into the romance novel business or something; that was beautiful. I can actually feel that, man, I..." he trailed off as he caught the change in Cloud's expression. "...what?"

"...hold that," Cloud finally blurted out, jumping back and dashing to his canvas. "Hold that angle and keep your hand right there! Hold that pose; we've got it!"

As Zell obliged him quickly, Cloud grabbed his pencils and started to work, drawing the picture of a boy's tattoo at a certain angle, accompanied by the silver and black glove on the hand propping up a forehead.

"..._The Advent Prodigy_...wait'll Leon hears about _this_ one...!"

* * *

_Silent Scope_: So, I hope this chapter answers your question. Sorry, though, Cid doesn't get laid in this story.

_shadows and sonic's girl_: I will; I'm compromising my nightly half-hour of sleep, but I've got a good thing going here, so I'll hold onto it for as long as I can.


	3. Turning Point

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**Web logs (blogs, as they call 'em) have to be the strangest things I've encountered on the internet by far... Who writes about a sausage buried and bored in hay anymore?**_

* * *

It was an hour after before the door to the apartment swung open a second time and Leon stepped in.  
With a happy bark, the little dog ran toward him and started jumping around for his attention.

"Who is it, Angelo? Is your Daddy home, snookums?"   
Cloud jogged in as well, a big overly cheerful grin on his face. "Yes, he is! Your Daddy is home!"

Leon frowned, but squatted and allowed the little thing to hop into his free arm, the other laden with his brown bag of supplies. "...I resent that..."

"Sorry, I just love messing with you." Cloud grinned even further as he said this, and waved him hurriedly to the couch. "Come on, sit down; I gotta show you something."

Leon raised his brow, but humored his blond housemate as he sat and released the puppy back to the floor. Cloud reached forward for the coffee table and picked up a canvas that was just drawn recently - the lead and charcoal had not completely set in with the special fixer yet - which he held out for Leon's viewing.

It looked like a wingless dragon, climbing a cliff of darkness with a shining peak.

"...interesting," Leon concluded, still staring thoughtfully at the canvas.

"Yeah, isn't it great? I'm thinking maybe a long sword, or a rapier, or even a rifle or something of the like! We can get ourselves another halberd! Trident! Bi-staff! Spear!"

"Cloud! Slow down!"

"What do you think of that?"

"Take a deep breath and hear me out."

Cloud stopped and looked down at himself, realizing he had gotten so caught up in the moment, he had jumped to his feet and was waving around like a three-year-old about to see his first zoo. Sitting down again, he inhaled carefully, then exhaled. Sheepish, he nodded for Leon to go ahead.  
"I'm listening, now."

Leon sat forward and nudged the puppy toward Cloud for the third time since he first sat down. "I need to meet him, first; I've not even seen him yet, so how can I get the carving right?"

"No problem; look there, through the studio window."

Leon obliged, and immediately caught sight of the blond figure in the room. A little shorter than the one next to him, wearing strangely-matched clothes, dancing back and forth while punching the air. Lost in his own little world with just the studio's radio for background ambience. The tattoo was bold and outright on the side of his face, stooping ever so slightly from the crease in his brow and the small frown on his face as he focused deeply and swung back and forth, still hopping from foot to foot.  
If Cloud was into martial arts instead of design work, they could have been almost identical brothers.

Cloud stared at his non-changing, deeply thoughtful expression that probably no one else could read, and waited. "...so, now what do you think?"

"...no."

Cloud's face fell. "...no?"

"...no long sword or rapier; too flimsy. No gun, either; it's insulting..." Leon trailed off as he rose and disappeared into the back. Finally, he came back out with an object wrapped in cloth, so big and cumbersome he had to use both hands just to bring it in.

The look on Cloud's face changed to one of great surprise. "...you never used the buster sword before; you kept saying it wasn't its time yet..."

"Now it is; I'm finally going to mark it," Leon answered, carefully unwrapping the weapon, yet keeping it in the cloth to prevent accidental injury. He stopped and looked carefully back at Cloud. "...do you think I'm being impulsive?"

Cloud's surprise faded, and he smiled. "I think you couldn't have made a better choice."

Leon stared back, then a ghost of a smile flickered unsteadily on his face before he hefted the item into his own studio in the room adjacent to Cloud's.  
"...keep him moving, and I'll get to work."

* * *

"Here I am with you lunch as usual, great one."

"Money's in the drawer."

"I know."

After working with the engine, Cid had moved up to start work on the damaged roof. This was one sad, broken car; almost like it had been beaten, kicked, abused, rammed into, gnawed at, spat at, thrown rocks at, and generally attacked by every person it met on the street.

"So once again: double bacon cheeseburger with extra bacon, sausage in cheese sauce, fries and extra ketchup, coffee with cream and sweetener," Aeris informed as she laid food out on the table. "Sorry I can't stay and chat, but I promised to go home early, give Tifa a break. So, your change is in the drawer as usual, and I'll take the box with me on my way out."

"What's wrong with your kid?" Cid asked gruffly from the top of the car, between the nails he held with his teeth.

Aeris shook her head as she folded up the box. "Why would you care?"

Cid did not answer verbally, but stared quietly at her, waiting. Aeris finally folded the box neatly, straightening up to leave. It was then she caught Cid's eye, and somewhere deep down - that same spot that caused her to continuously deliver the old grouch lunch no matter how much of a wisecrack he was - she made a choice.

"...not my adoptee, directly; he's the closest I have to a nephew. His immune system is a wreck, sometimes he's too tired to even go outside and play, and in his worse times, he is covered in black pus, and - does this disturb you?"

Cid blinked and shook his head quickly. "Go on."

"...and there are the worst times, when it hits him so bad, Tifa has to rush him to the medical center in the dead of night, leaving Marlene and Yuffie home alone until I can manage to get away from the cafe and grab a cab home. Then, he'll be in the emergency room for a couple of hours, attended to by any five-year-old who just pulled a doctor's license from a cereal box."

"So what is it?"

"Geostigma's our top suspect, but since we can hardly afford such treatment..." Aeris trailed off, then nodded and started to leave. "Nice talking to you."

"What's his name?"

Aeris turned back and looked straight into the older man's eyes. Then her expression relaxed into the familiar friendliness that was her unofficial trademark. "Denzel. Denzel Lockhart."

Cid nodded. "Okay. You'd better go home, now."

"Alright; see you next call."

The door swung shut as Aeris walked down the street and turned the corner. Cid watched her go thoughtfully, then smirked at himself before resuming his work.

* * *

"So you guys are almost done, huh?"

"Yeah; there's still one more stage to go."

Zell nodded offhandedly as he continued throwing punches at an imagined opponent, an evil nemesis that required the greatest of martial arts to overcome. "It's been a whole week of nothing but work...time for some fun! Hey, Cloud, watch this one: BOOYA!"

"Whoa! Be careful with my flooring!" Cloud yelped, jumping up in an instant.

"Only kidding!" Zell sang out cheerily as he hopped back without smashing his raised foot down into the wood. "Man, you two are _so_ uptight!"

"That was not necessary!" Cloud protested, sitting down again. Finally, he went back to watching Zell show off. Much like the one in the adjacent studio was doing through the panel.

Leon shook his head in resignation as he wiped down the markings he had lined the buster sword with. It was going down the entire length of the blade on both sides, and all that was left was to fill it in with the right color.

Selecting different vials one at a time, he held them up to his eye, watching Zell for a comparison. Each time, he set it back down to pick another.

Finally, he picked one of the last vials, and held it up. It was then he stopped looking at Zell, and looked instead at Cloud. He had not heard the conversation, but the man was smirking slightly - one of those looks that betrayed the beholder's true intentions. Trying so hard to be curt, but wanting so much to laugh out loud.

His hand promptly went down and selected another vial.

...Perfect.

_...this one is for you._

Popping the cap, Leon started to give the engravings color.

* * *

The next day, the time of unraveling had finally come.

Zell would enter that house for the last time in matter of business, and - unless they made the effort to keep in touch - they might never meet again. After all, this was all just between a designer and a model; all just business.

As Cloud admitted Zell in accustomed manner, he noticed the shorter blond reach down and scoop up the puppy on his way to the studio.  
"What's up with that?"

"Nothing, just...ah...wanted to warm up to the little guy some more before I'm outta here."

Cloud did not seem to buy it, then shrugged and let it go as he followed the other into his studio. "So, you're all set to see our hard work's reward?"

Zell let Angelo loose on the floor and hit the radio. "Nah, it can wait; this is the end of all that restlessness; it's time to party!"

"Hey! Whoa! Easy on that! Too loud, man! Too loud! Watch out for Angelo!"  
Cloud started to bolt after the excited Zell, trying to keep him from knocking anything over. For some reason, it was like dealing with a nine-year-old all over again.

After nearly tripping over either Angelo or Cloud for the tenth time, Zell finally stopped bouncing around and calmed down. Somewhat.

Cloud reached over and lowered the volume on the radio. "...so, you done with the party, yet?"

Zell ran his hand through his hair sheepishly. "Uh...yeah. Yeah, I'm okay now."

Cloud nodded, keeping one wary eye on him as he backed up toward the wall. There, lying in the corner, was a large object wrapped in cloth. Cloud turned around and hefted it up. As he moved it toward a small table in the center of the room, he motioned for Zell to come as well.

"... Well, this is it."

The cloth fell away to reveal the buster sword in all its glory. Engraved along an invisible center line was a large black, wingless dragon mounting a silver-peaked cliff. Some of the edges of the dragon's clawed feet and tail had been tipped with highly modest amounts of gold and silver, and the blade's silver held that sharp contrast against the black.

"..._Advent Prodigy _- No matter what must come your way, know you are strong, and know you will overcome...know you are not alone."

"...wow..." Zell managed to utter, not even daring to touch the massive blade. "...wow, I...I don't know what to say... I had a part in making this?"

Cloud nodded. "That's right, you did. Thank you, Zell."

Zell seemed to be frozen as he continued to stand there without moving. Finally, his hand came up - the same gloved hand that now was portrayed as a silver-peaked cliff - and touched the blade, almost caressing the smooth surface. Then he looked up, and there was a strange gleam in his eye.  
"...Cloud, I have to tell you something."

"What about?"

"...Cloud, I-"

The moment was interrupted as the puppy started to bark shrilly. Both turned to look as the little guy bolted for the closed door, scratching at it with both feet in a desperate attempt to get out. All the while, it continued to bark.

"Angelo! Buddy, you want some chocolate?"

"No; he's not allowed!"

Zell's hand dropped from his pocket as Cloud crossed over to the door.

"Hey, snookums, what is it? You want to go out?"

"Cloud, wait!"

Cloud looked back at Zell, waiting.

"I...ah...I gotta go soon, and...um..."

"...yes?"

"I gotta look at this a little bit longer, is that okay?"  
This said, Zell turned back to the buster sword and carefully reached out toward it again.

Cloud watched his actions, then swung open the door and let Angelo out. The puppy continued to bark as it bolted straight for the living room. Cloud immediately followed.

"What is it, boy? You thirsty? Is that it? Hey, slow down!"

Suddenly, the dog screeched to a halt, nails scratching against the wood flooring, as it shrunk away. As Cloud caught up, he found himself looking straight at a lady with silver hair, an eye-patch and blue clothing...stuffing their engraved weapons and their protective coverings into a large bag.  
There was a clutter from the next room, and a large barrel-chested man bolted out with their collection of engraved rifles.  
Both stopped and stared back, caught red-handed in their actions.

"Cloud!"

Angelo flattened instinctively as Zell jumped over it and behind Cloud. The latter turned and looked the shorter one straight in the eye. It was a look that knew.

"...why, Zell...?"

"I can explain..."

"_Why are you doing this?_"

Zell quailed slightly under the suddenly cold, brittle eyes, but continued to plead his case. "Cloud, I'm sorry; I didn't want you to get hurt; then I saw the engraving, and I-"

"What are you doing, Chicken Wuss? _Cruising him_?"

Cloud turned one second too late as a strong fist struck him in the back of his head. As he fell, the tall sandy-blond one with a dirty trench coat grabbed a pole arm and threw himself upon him.  
"D.C., go to plan B! PLAN B!"

The lady and man blinked out of their stupor, and within seconds, joined in the fray.

"ZELL, _HELP ME_!"

Backed into the corner, Zell watched - like a deer in headlights - as Seifer and his posse started to beat the living crap out of Cloud with blunt weapons. Those same weapons that Cloud had put so much effort into designing engravings for.

Then there was the sound of glass breaking that stopped all of them in their tracks.

The three assaulters turned to see Leon there in the doorway of his studio, the bag of vials dropped on the floor and soaking into brown paper bag. The man suddenly looked more towering, more menacing, more predatory than Zell remembered.

With a swift kick, Leon shoved Angelo into the studio and closed the door behind him, effectively shutting the shocked puppy in. Then he pulled out one of the many weapons - a gunblade with a gold and red lion engraving. His own eyes burned with an intense fire as he swung forward.

The posse hastily scrambled out of the way as Seifer reached for a second gunblade to parry. One continued to lunge, and the other continued to back up and defend himself. All the while, Cloud remained unmoving on the floor, a crumpled form like the rejected design sketches that often made up the daily trash.

With every strike, Leon became more and more aggressive, and Seifer more and more wary. Leon knew his business, had picked a gunblade that was easily interchangeable between one-handed and two-handed. Seifer was a kid off the street, and had grabbed a one-handed sort, putting himself a little more at the disadvantage in weapon's weight issues.  
Two strikes was all Leon needed to knock the blade out of the other's hand and into the couch cushions.

Seifer swallowed nervously and retreated as the intensely infuriated man stepped toward him.  
"Look, can't we talk about this like civilized people?"

"...I'll kill you."  
That was all Leon uttered before swinging the blade back.

There was a sudden flash of silver, and a loud cry of pain echoed through the apartment, followed by the sound of the first gunblade hitting the ground.

At the entrance was the figure of a tall man with long silver hair, his eyes unreadable as he held an incredibly long katana, the blade slowly coloring crimson with blood.

Seifer yelped and fell on his butt, scrambling backward. "Mr. Sephiroth! We-!"

"_You were taking too long_."

The katana ripped its way back out of Leon's shoulder as the man drew back. As he staggered, Leon did not see Sephiroth draw back and raise his leg. The boot struck him right at the lower back, sending him flying all the way across the living room.

Seifer, his posse and Zell stared dumbstruck before Seifer recovered and scrambled to his feet. "Let's get out of here!"

"_I'm not finished yet_."

Sephiroth - an eerily dangerous presence in himself - almost glided across the room as he moved toward the slowly stirring figure of Leon. He paused only once, and his other hand found another weapon: a silver revolver with black engravings of a winged, horned humanoid lion lining the barrel.

Leon groaned as he forced his eyes open. Then they widened further as the dark hole of the barrel pointed down at him.

Eyes of the oppressor bore into the eyes of the oppressed. Both held that gaze for a long time, almost like an eternity to the onlookers that made up Sephiroth's little troupe of henchmen.

Then Sephiroth's still expression broke into a smirk. His eyes flashed with a strange gleam, and everyone conscious immediately knew what was coming next.

"Mr. Sephiroth!"

"Boss, NO!"

_**BANG!**_

_**BANG! BANG! BANG!**_

Behind the protective barrier that was Leon's studio door, Angelo whimpered as it shrunk down and flattened itself once again.  
The strangers and Zell left the apartment, taking everything in the living room with them.

All except for the two broken, bleeding bodies lying on the floor.

Only then did Angelo dare to make a sound.

The puppy threw his head back and howled.

* * *

_**Special thanks goes to Howling WereWolf and her friend Jade for the design ideas (and thank you, HW, for keeping the events of this chapter as much under covers as you could; I know how badly you wanted to blurt it out to Jade, and I understand. Your pain has now ended).  
Credit as well to Howling WereWolf for the "D.C." idea, taken out of FF8's Disciplinary Committee.**_

_Silent Scope_: So did I, but I couldn't find anything. That's why I decided to write one myself; this is my second attempt.

_shadows and sonic's girl_: And you have. I love your enthusiastic show of support.

_Sorceress Fantasia_: Ah...can I keep that part about relationships to myself for now (actually, I haven't really gone into that bit yet...)? And Andre's a character I made up simply for the purpose of taking the role of the incredibly lousy agent. Couldn't have any of the cameos do it, could I?

_Niana Kuonji_: That's good to hear.


	4. Terms and Conditions Apply

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**Beforehand, I must confess and say I had very little idea what I would do if I kept Leon alive. Yet, now I have my answer. Howling WereWolf has been the most enthusiastic and wonderful help I've had since I first started this. I can guess she is losing as much sleep as I am, and from what I calculate, she's got to be undergoing some assignments herself. Her and her friend Jade have been such great, great helps to me and the updates.  
Thank you both, girls.  
And HW, kid, you don't have to continuously borrow "As Good As It Gets" from your library just to keep me going; I appreciate your gesture, but I nearly fell asleep reviewing the commentary.**_

* * *

"...so you didn't see _anything_?"

"Yes, damn it; that's what I've been saying five times already!"

Outside _Highwind's Repairs_, Cid was not exactly hitting it off well with the cops. Fortunately for the both of them, the inspector was a good-natured fellow. Then, again, he was also the only one who sported a pony tail, dressed in cowboy shebang, and had a rifle slung over his shoulder like a ranger from the South Side. On his tan coat was the tag stenciled "I. Kinneas".

Upstairs, in the thrashed apartment, one or two investigators were already filing through the place in practiced motion, the customary police teams in every other corner around them. Prints were searched for, samples collected, anything that could be possible evidence was picked up. Except for the trail marks of the gurneys rolled out earlier.

"Tidus, don't break anything," a tall blond lady reminded, kneeling slightly to further study something on the cracked glass door.

"I won't," a short almost child-like youth answered, picking his way through the mess in an almost overly cautious manner. Then again, you can never be too cautious in a crime scene.  
Something caught the short one's eye, and he turned to look down, through a different studio door, at a small huddled brown and white furry object that was perfectly still.

"Hey, puppy, what are you doing back there?"  
Getting a hold on the door handle with a gloved hand, Tidus pushed down and yanked the door open.

In a flash of skewbald, the little creature slipped through the opening and zipped away, too fast for Tidus to catch him. Within two seconds flat, it was as though the puppy had not been there in the first place.

"...whoops." He paused to suck in a nice deep breath between his teeth. "Ah...Quistis?"

"Did you do something you shouldn't have?"

"No! I, um...hm." Tidus stopped himself and cleared his throat carefully. "...I'm just gonna take a look in here, see if there's anything I can find."

The blond lady shot him a knowing glance, then let it go and resumed her examination. "Okay, just be careful."

"Yeah... yup," Tidus answered quickly before stepping into a studio filled with metal-crafting tools, dyes, brushes...

Barely noticeable little paw prints of colored dye followed the gurney tracks out the door and down the stairs.

* * *

Inspector Kinneas looked up as his colleagues came down. "So...anything?"

"Not even a scrap of torn cloth; we did find some blood samples, but seeing how thumped up the victims were..."

"Nothing solid, then," the inspector concluded. Snapping his trusty - and rather stereotypical - notebook shut, he nodded politely at Cid. "Thank you for your time, we'll come by again when you're ready to speak decently with us."

"What now, trying to intimidate me, cowboy?" Cid snapped at his departing back. "You think you can scare the whole world, but you don't scare me! You're not even close! I come from the depths of hell, boy! I know twenty grandmothers with more attitude! Go run down a donut shop for a handful of greasy chocolate sprinkles!"

Inspector Kinneas halted and looked back at Cid with an incredulously amused expression. Shaking his head while chuckling, he hustled his colleagues back into the car to drive off.

"...freakin' coppers," Cid muttered, flipping a finger after them. Then a small movement caught his eye, and he looked down the street.

Right next to his street sign stood a little brown and white pup with dye on his paws. The small animal looked back, almost fearfully, then started to bark.

"Don't waggle at me, monkey; I didn't name ya! Beat it!"

Without another glance back, Cid ducked into his shop to resume his work.

Eventually, the dog stopped barking.

* * *

There was a tense silence in the hospital room. Cloud had been fortunate to get one of the more empty wards, and the two others who were sharing it were either undergoing medical examination or sleeping.

Sitting at a barstool by the cot, all Sora could do was twiddle his thumbs, looking more at the floor than at his older friend lying down, half hidden by white sheets and white bandages, and holding an ice pack to his newly acquired black eye.

"...just how bad is it?"

Sora looked at him again, and promptly looked back down as his thumbs moved faster in a desperate attempt to calm himself.  
"...not _that_ bad...yeah...nothing that won't heal. Riku and I were talking with the doctor; the cuts and bruises will be gone before you know it, and then all you have to do is take it easy until your ribs and arm catch up. The scars might take a while, but-"

Cloud sighed and took the bag away, flinching as the swollen-shut eye made contact with the air again. "I'm not talking about myself, and we both know it."

"Please don't make me do this, man..." Sora managed out. "Great Hyne, can't we let Riku do it?" he finally blurted, throwing his hands forward in an almost desperate plea.

Cloud stared at him thoughtfully, then returned the icepack to his eye. "...okay by me."

"Thank you."

Riku chose this moment to walk in and join them, pulling up a chair to sit next to Sora.  
"...so are sure you're ready to hear it?"

Cloud muttered something about giving the devil time, then relented.  
"How's Angelo, anyway?"

Riku and Sora looked at each other for a split second before Riku answered.

"One of the inspectors - Tidus, you remember him - said something about seeing him in the apartment; Sora and I will go by later."

"Just don't let Mr. Highwind get to him first, and I have no complaints," Cloud muttered. "...and Leon?"

Finally, the delay was breached. Riku cleared his throat and shut his eyes as he spoke into the hand over his mouth.

"Stabbed once and shot four times. Whoever was responsible knew what he was doing, was right up next to him."

"...where?"

"Stab wound in the shoulder, one bullet to the hand, one bullet to the lower back, the last two to the..." at this point, Riku coughed and opened his eyes to look at the floor. "tothebuttandcrotch."

"Oh Hyne, that sick bastard," Sora moaned, burying his face in his hands.

Cloud took the icepack down once again, both eyes attempting to meet a compromise as they looked long and hard at nothing in particular. While on one hand, he seemed to be making sense of it, he looked like he wanted to just get up and kill whoever it was slowly and painfully.

"Doctor says you can see him later, when you're ready to get up. Is that okay?"

Cloud did not respond straight away. Finally, he just nodded his head and leaned back. "...yes, that's fine."

* * *

It was somewhere in late noon when rain started to fall.

Cid swore to himself and cut the power to the radio he was still trying to piece back together. Well, at least he found out it was a radio.

Stepping away from his workbench, he moved to sort the papers on his receptionist desk. One of these days, he'd need to employ some help. Perhaps a few strong fellows, tough-bodied ones who did not mind hard work and lousy wages.

So long as they were not queer men or timid, self-conscious ladies.

Then he looked out.

Flat against the floor near the shop sign was something brown, white, furry and incredibly soggy, getting soggier by the minute but not moving.

Cid stared at it a little longer, then cussed at it under his breath before he disappeared back inside to file the papers away.

* * *

When Cloud finally convinced the doctors and his two friends to let him get up, he decided it was time to see Leon for himself.

He had walked in to find his roommate lying silently on the cot, head turned to the side and looking away from anyone and everyone.

"...Leon?"

"Leave me alone."

Here was the tricky part. Up until now, Cloud was certain of what he would do. If Leon was pushing people away at the moment...

Taking the gamble, the blonde sat himself down, reaching over cautiously toward the still hand with his own.

The hand clenched and moved away.

_...damn._

The two sat that way for a while, not moving, not speaking, waiting for the other to act.

Cloud's patience paid off as Leon finally broke the silence.

"The doctor was in here earlier; he told me what happened."

"I know."

"You don't," Leon answered bluntly finally turning his head back around. Cold eyes bore into Cloud's. Any other would shrink away.  
"Soldiers die to protect what is important. Soldiers don't survive as humiliated, broken things, stuck on their arses for the rest of their lives."

"Leon-"

"Why didn't any of you just let me die?"

Cloud sighed; he had seen this coming, but it still hurt. He continued to sit as Leon turned away again.

"Could you leave now?"

"Sure."

Tentatively, Cloud reached over and placed a hand on Leon's shoulder. Then he took it away and left the ward.

* * *

The lightning and thunder arrived, just as the rain got heavier.

Cid walked to his shop entrance once more, looking out at muttering.

Heavy rain meant fewer customers - no customers, even.

It also meant what's-his-surname Johnny would come by for Aeris, just so she wouldn't get hit by the weather.

He wasn't too fond of this Johnny, and Johnny didn't like him either anyway.

He _could_ always risk the wrath of the neighbors if the radio caused a blackout in such conditions, but he didn't need it.

That meant a nice long period of boredom.

He spotted the mound of wet brown and white once again. There was slight movement now; the thing had huddled closer to the shop sign, as though trying to get the minimum shelter it could from there.

By now, the water level was going up, too.

_I don't need a bloody stupid dog in my shop!_

Cid reached for the door handle and pulled.

_I never did, and I never will!_

Jerking the door open, he ducked as a cascade of water splattered down from the roof.

"DAMN IT, YOU LITTLE PISSANT MUTT! GET YOUR FREAKIN' ARSE IN HERE!"

* * *

_**Sorry about the long wait - Jimmy and I were co-working our script for the boss when my chest seized up for half a second (or less); poor Jimmy panicked and pinned me to the couch while he called his medical graduate sister for advice. I'm okay, though, didn't even need to see a doctor (or go to the hospital...damnit, Jimmy, your freakin' Goliath weight could've broke my ribs!).**_

_**The script is changing, and the future is so uncertain... Man, I feel so sore...gotta breathe nice an' deep an' steady...**_

_**And I think I need to lay off the caffeine and get some sleep before Jimmy rats to Dad Marco (and Mom Lexi, if I get lucky). The last thing I need is either of them "house arresting" me right now...**_

_Silent Scope_: So do I; so do I...

_Niana Kuonji_: uh...I think I did (wait, are we talking about the same thing?).


	5. Adaptations

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**Sorry I took so long just to get this out; turns out Jimmy did call Marco and Lexi after all; I was under "house arrest" ( they think I'm too old to be just "grounded" ) until I recovered - Christmas Day. Turns out resting did me a big favor after all; I feel a whole lot better now.**_

* * *

Cid hastily got out of the way as a little wet thing zipped into his shop, leaving a trail of wet spots all over the floor. It finally stopped long enough to be identified, panting.

Cid paled as he realized what the thing was up to. "DON'T YOU DA-"

Too late.

The little creature shook itself thoroughly, spraying water in every direction. Cursing nice and loud, Cid grabbed a towel and threw it over the shaking animal. Covered by said towel, the thing stopped its shaking and was still.

Cid took this opportunity to examine the damage. Water droplets dripped off the lower of a wall, water patterns were streaked on the floor, bench and chair legs were slightly more prominently colored by the moisture, even his pants and shoes were dark with the water that had soaked in.  
Shaking slightly himself, Cid glared disgustedly at the towel-covered critter, he finally mustered the will to point at it and curse softly.

"...you're dead."

The mound under the towel shrunk as the animal flattened submissively.

Cid resigned himself to shaking his head in irritation as he grabbed a rag and threw it on the floor, wiping up the water patterns. "...we don't have no dog food here, and we don't want no dog food here. You'll eat what we _got_; what _we_ eat."

There was no answer from the towel and the little mound under the towel. As Cid picked up the now heavily damp rag, the towel lifted slightly again and started to move across the room as discreetly as possible.

Dumping the rag into the laundry bag in the corner, Cid turned sharply and barked at the towel. "Don't you _do_ anything!"

Immediately, the towel stopped and flattened slightly once again, this time making no more moves.

Cid spit out his straw as he disappeared further into the shop. Moments later, he reemerged with what was leftover from the lunch he ordered and saved for such an occasion: three-quarters of a bacon cheeseburger and one sausage in meager cheese sauce, both on disposable plates.

Setting the plate of sausage and cheese on the table, Cid pried open the burger and removed the lone strip of bacon, laying it next to the sausage. Finally, he set the plate of one bacon, one sausage and cheese sauce down on the floor. Pulling up a chair, he sat down and waited.

The towel did not move.

Cid leaned back on the rest, and gestured with a jerk of his head. "Go on; that's yours."

The towel did not respond.

"Suit yourself...pissant mutt," Cid muttered, picking up the burger and biting into it. Turning slightly, he turned on the radio.

_**click**_

"**_-I tried so hard, and got so far,  
in the end, it doesn't even matter.  
I had to f-_**"

_**click**_

"Freakin' hell, I hate that stupid song," Cid growled, turning the radio off.

In the returned silence, there was a soft munching sound. Cid looked down again to see the puppy's head emerged from the towel, little teeth working their way eagerly through the bacon.

Cid watched until it moved on to the sausage, then sighed heavily and went back to his burger.

* * *

After the nurse had all but chased them back outside, Sora and Riku were left with one top priority mission.

"...well."

"..."

"... How are we going to find one small border collie puppy in Traverse Town?"

"Try digging through our paper bin?"

"That joke's a little old, isn't it?"

"It's the truth."

Before Sora can reply, his mobile starts to vibrate. Pulling it out of his pocket, he takes the call.  
"...Hello, S&R Recycling."

_**"Are you the Shit or the Rat?"**_

Sora blinked, then answered the caller that both he and Riku knew all too well.  
"...this is _Sora_ speaking. Can I help you, Mr. Highwind?"

_**"I've got the dog here, so come get him."**_

Sora froze. The future suddenly seemed to dim drastically. "...you... I'm sorry, what?"

_**"Don't make me repeat myself, you dang little ninny! Now get your stubborn ass down here, and get it outta my place!"**_

_**beep!**_

Sora remained frozen to the spot for a while, listening to the droning beep of his cell in his ear. Finally, he lowered the mobile and looked toward the older.

"...ah...Riku? About the dog..."

* * *

Slamming the phone back down, Cid spat his second piece of straw out. "Damn dustbin boys..."

The puppy licked up the last of the cheese sauce on the plate, and burped.

"Sheesh, your darling Mamma and Pappy never teach you any manners?" Cid commented, not exactly expecting an answer either way.

The puppy yawned and smacked its lips. Then it took one look at Cid and flattened itself on the floor again.

"Spineless little nit," Cid growled, swiping up the plate and dropping it into the nearby waste bin.

The pup watched Cid quietly from the corner of its eye. Slowly, carefully, it started to crawl toward the bigger man. Finally, it came to a halt five inches away from his heel.  
In these unfamiliar surroundings, any amount of security he could get off any familiar figure was all it needed to get through this.

Cid looked down and spotted the still damp little critter huddled near his leg, and muttered, "stupid little pissant wimp."

Suddenly, there was a flash of dark gray as a giant rat sped by the wall, immediately catching Cid's attention. Cid was about to cuss up a storm and give chase when an idea came to him.

"Hey, you; you want to earn your keep here, then do something useful." As he addressed the little bugger near his heel, he nodded in the direction that the rat had sped off to. "_Fetch that thing._"

Immediately, the pup jumped up and ran after the rat, yapping his little head off as both disappeared around the corner. Soon, there was a muffled squeak.

Cid guffawed. "Disgusting; that runt _is_ a wimp! Nothing but a spineless, gutless little-"

_**ptoo**_

Cid's eyes widened in shock as the wet but still perfectly unharmed rat bounced off his boots and skittered away again.

Sitting near his foot at the five-inch mark, the puppy stared up at him with a disgusted expression that could almost easily be translated into words:  
_You bloody fool, that was a **rat** you made me put in my mouth._

Then, before Cid could catch on, he turned and whizzed on the man's pant leg before scuffing the ground and scampering off.

Cid stared after it, stunned and immobile, a smooth streak of dog spit and rat stink across his boots, and a large patch of dog piss on his pants.

Finally, he shook his head, choking out befuddled laughter.

"...I'll be damned; guess that little bugger's got _some_ spirit in him, after all."

* * *

Meanwhile, Sora was in a panic.

"We can't tell Cloud about this; he'll freak!"

"And Leon would gut and stuff us with their combined collection of 'Get Well Soon' cards and flowers," Riku mused.

"You're not helping!" Sora yelped, plentiful images of the enraged duo murdering them in cold blood with hospital equipment going through his mind.  
"Look, we just gotta get Angelo back as soon as we can-"

"And then what? Sora, you know we can't keep a dog in our place."

"We could find someone else!"

"Who's going to watch a dog for three months at such short notice?"

"Then suggest something!"

"Let's start with sitting down and _breathing_."

Sora did just that. Riku waited patiently for his colleague to calm himself before stating his piece.  
Sora listened to all of it, then paled as he caught on.

"...Riku, _no_."

* * *

The sound of a truck pulling up drew Cid outside, now in his socks and a fresh pair of pants, the soiled articles soaking in a basin. Hefting open the door, he looked outside. The rain had stopped by now.  
"You took your time al-"

A leather leash and collar flew into his hands.

"-right. What are you doing?"

"Thanks for looking after him!" Riku called out, turning the still running truck around to leave.

Cid realized what was going on a second later than he preferred. "...wait a freakin' second! Come back here! _You can't do this to me_!"

"Have fun with each other, Mr. Highwind!" Sora called as the truck drove away.

"HEY! I can't take no dog; nobody's ever been in here before!" Cid hollered after the truck, still stuck inside the building due to his lack of boots. "...hey, fellas? Boys? Bubs...?"

They were already gone.

"...aw, shit."

Cid retreated back further into the building, warily searching for the puppy that was now doomed to stay in his building for who knew how long. He finally found it curled up near the heater, exhausted from that long, long day.

As he stared at it, then at the soiled clothes still soaking in the tub, then back at it, a thought suddenly struck him.

Maybe, just maybe, things were not as bad as he made them out to be.

It would be rough, but who said he couldn't enjoy it?

The puppy grunted, got up and squatted. Within seconds, a whole new smell filled the air.

Screw all of this; he wanted out _right now_.

* * *

_**Merry belated Christmas and a happy New Year, one and all.**_

_**P.S. I have nothing against Linkin' Park; I'm actually the owner of two Linkin' Park Music CDs. This particular song (In The End) has lyrics that hold a special significance to the later development of the story, so bear with us for now.**_

_**Sorry about the whole switching between "it" and "he" regarding Angelo; I get so absorbed by my writing, I even confuse myself at times.**_

_**Another note is that he has two radios - one that works and the other that he is attempting to fix; nothing to confuse ourselves over.**_

_Sorceress Fantasia_: Yeah, I know; that part got tricky to get out for me as well. I'll try and make things easier for the both of them as it goes.

_Niana Kuonji_: Love the optimism here. And yes, Angelo is one charismatic little dog.

_Silent Scope_: Ow for Leon is right; and now that I've been rested, I'll see what I can do about the next update.


	6. Attachment

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**Well, folks, I'm home! Actually, I've been home for several days now; I just decided to make my boss happy and finish up what I could while I was on a roll.**_

_**Anyway, here it is again. Please enjoy.**_

_**Extra - I recently got my hands on an edited picture of Leon (by Flypipe), and it inspired me to write something for the Advent Children movie. While I was at it, I found out what caused Geostigma, and how it was cured.  
Which brought one minor problem - Aeris isn't dead.**_

_**Sorry, folks, but in order to keep things going the way they are, I'll have to throw in the infamous Edit for Fiction Purposes...what can I say? I'm sorry!**_

_**As a further note, this chapter is speeding things up by a lot. Meaning, a time change of several days, weeks and everything. You get the idea, I hope. I'm sorry to rush it, but that's what happened in the movie as well - the focus just wasn't on Melvin Udall and Verdell bonding that much.**_

* * *

The door to the shop _Highwind's Repairs_ swung open, and the small brown border collie pup known as Angelo padded out onto the front step, sniffing carefully. At the door, Cid waited for the little critter to do its thing.

"..."

Cid checked his watch, then continued to wait for the puppy to do something.

Do anything.

He checked his watch again some time later, then glared at the puppy still on the front step.

The puppy let out a small bark.

"_GO ALREADY_!"

With a startled yip, Angelo took off out of the store and into the street.  
Leaving the door open for the puppy, Cid muttered under his breath as he whipped up another bit of straw, chewing on it dejectedly.

Aeris was late; something that was not as common as he would have liked.

When she finally did show up, she was not alone either.

Cid nodded absentmindedly in response to the greetings as he watched two young girls make themselves comfy on the floor with whatever portable games they had brought with them.

Aeris, laying out the platters of food on the table, folded up the box as she looked outside at the puppy half into a bush.  
"Is that your dog?"

Cid merely grunted in reply.

Aeris found the whole matter rather amusing.  
"What is a grumpy old fellow like you doing with a dog?"

"...suckered in, duped, conned, pushed around..." Cid listed offhandedly, now looking at the dog outside as well.

Aeris and Cid watched as the puppy finally reemerged from the bush, looking more comfortable than earlier.

"You're not worried it might get run over or something?"

At her words, Cid was immediately on his feet once again. "Not until now, for pissake."

"...sorry?"

Cid strode straight up to the door and hollered out at the little dog. "_GET BACK IN HERE_!"

In the blink of an eye, the pup zipped back inside, freezing for a moment in the doorway before shaking itself thoroughly and scampering into the room.

The two girls stopped what they were doing as they caught sight of the little animal. The older broke into a delighted smile and held out her hand. As the puppy carefully approached to sniff at it, the younger got closer too and copied her actions.  
Soon, the three of them were like the best of buddies, the two girls petting and tickling the little animal as it squirmed with pleasure.

Aeris watched them for a moment, then smirked in Cid's direction. "You know, you could learn a lot of people skills from that dog."

Cid merely grunted before nodding in the girls' direction. "...did something happen?"

"What do you mean?"

"You bringing them with you; hiking them all over the place like that sure can't be bonding."

"Oh, and you care?" Aeris added a laugh to the statement. Then, under Cid's pressurizing stare, she sighed.  
"Denzel had a full-blown attack last night. Tifa's brought him to the lodge again, and hasn't come back - last call said something about them giving us the wrong medication just for further excitement."  
Then she changed the subject as she looked down at his order again. "What's with all the extra meat? Decided to swear off your favorite fries?"

"...forthedog," came a grumbled reply.

Aeris' eyebrows shot upward. "What?"

"It's for the dog. I've been feeding him my leftover bacon and sausage. Then I turn on the radio, and well, he likes it. So I thought, I'd make a little joke, and..." Cid drifted off as he studied Aeris' expression.  
"...what's so funny?"

"Oh, nothing! So you're all set here? Good! See you next call! Let's go now, girls!"

Still wearing that bemused look on her face, Aeris ushered out the disappointed girls as they headed out of the store once more. The puppy, slightly rumpled from the play and still flat on its back, rolled back upright and appeared very disappointed itself.

Cid grumbled to himself as he pulled out a few strips of bacon from his burger and laid them with the extra platter of sausage, all before setting the platter to the floor.

"...just get over here and eat, you stupid dog-eared gopher."

The dog did not complain.

* * *

"...I think it's a pretty good day for working in; very nice."

Cid was once again at his work bench, fiddling carefully with the broken radio that was still somehow not fixed. Lying on the floor and looking rather satisfied, Angelo watched him at his work silently.

Then the infamous large rat ran by, sending the pup up on its feet once more. Although Angelo no longer sought to grab the rat in its mouth as it did before - that was disgusting enough - the little critter found some excitement in chasing after the terrified pestilence, seeing how much it could worry the rat before it disappeared down a hole.  
Cid had long since given up trying to kill the confounded pest, and came to take this source of entertainment when it came.

The rat saw the pup coming for it once again, and let out a terrible, high-pitched scream as it fled, a pair of teeth-filled jaws snapping inches from its tail.

As they bounded all around the room, Cid watched with resigned amusement as they once again made a mess of the already messy place.

Then the rat bounced off the bench top and away. Cid's eyes widened as he saw what was coming.  
"Oh no, you d-"

Then the puppy jumped up onto the bench top as well, smacking the nearby spanner to whack into the broken radio, Cid getting his hands out of the way just in time.

"SON OF A-" Cid just started to swear when he stopped and listened. Then he reached over and tentatively turned the knob as he tuned the radio.

_**click!**_

**"And for tomorrow's weather forecast, we'll be expecting plenty of sun, with brief showers over some regions..."**

"...fixed it," Cid got out, then turned to look at the confused puppy that had hastily leapt back to the floor. "...you bloody _fixed_ it."

As the weatherman continued his forecast to the disinterest of both characters, Cid got to his feet and pumped his fist triumphantly.  
"This piece of junk is off my hands!"

Angelo yipped as Cid strode over and rubbed its head in a rough manner.

"Yes, I hate the doggy. Oh, yes, I hate the doggy..." Cid muttered to himself, grinning from ear to ear as he headed off to call his client. "I've got it made, baby! FIXED, damn it!"

Angelo wagged its tail, then started shaking its fur thoroughly.

* * *

It took some more days, but the fixed radio finally left the store once and for all, and Cid had more munny down his pocket.

As the client left with his appliance, Cid spotted Angelo just a little behind him and sitting down. As he walked up to him again, the puppy yipped and wagged its tail as it waited hopefully.

"You're a bloody little genius, you know that? What's the matter - you want my place around here when you grow up, you little bugger? Well, I'm gonna tell you something! I'm gonna give it to you real good, too...and I'm gonna show it to ya... C'mere, kid."

His hands slipping easily under the pup's forelimbs, he lifted the little animal up to eye level.  
"Don't be like me; don't you be like me. You stay just the way you are, cos' you are _the_ perfect man. Now you just wait, and I'll get you something to _eat_! What you love, you hear me? You like the sound of that, fella?"

Panting slightly, Angelo wagged its tail harder.

"Yeah, I know you do, critter. Now let's get back inside and get you something! Yeah, let's nuke up that meat and fire up the radio, just the way you like it!"

Setting the pup back down, Cid strode back in toward his living quarters, the little animal scampering to keep up.

* * *

Sora sighed as he sat down again, a stack of papers in his hand.  
"Cloud, let me get this straight - you and Leon have been working with swords, blades, axes, pole arms, guns even...and _neither you have medical insurance?_"

Cloud, looking more of his old self save for his mending arm in a sling, shrugged. "We couldn't afford it when we first started out, then later it just didn't occur to us..."

"This isn't helpful to your situation at all, you know that," Riku commented, flipping through another stack of papers that he had. Bills of all kinds, either under Cloud or Leon's name, and seemingly repetitive over their request for payments.

"Thanks for the encouragement there; I appreciate it," Cloud responded dryly. "...so I'm going home today, huh? Not much of a homecoming with all this paper, is it?"

"Afraid not."

"So how's Angelo doing?"

Sora coughed nervously and sent a quick glance in Riku's direction; the older boy took it from there.

"Your dog's fine, Cloud; as a matter of fact, we'll pick him up for you after we drop you off."

Cloud looked from one to the other, a skeptical look on his face. Then he shrugged it off and turned to rise.  
"...well, I'm ready to get out of here, so help me."

* * *

"Here we go, now; your usual lunch and radio service courtesy of Highwind Kitchens."

Cid popped open the microwave oven door and lifted out the extra platter of sausage in cheese sauce with bacon strips on top. Poking at the food with a fork to check the temperature, he was finally satisfied and set it down.

Angelo trotted in, wagging its tail as it eagerly sought out its stomach's desire.

"...what are you doing in here? I can't work in a kitchen pad with a dog stepping all over; come on! When you gotta wait, you gotta wait. What've I taught you about basic courtesy-"

_**Ring! Ring!**_

"And that will be the door. We don't want customers while we eat, we don't. I'll just see, now..."

Wiping his hands off on a cloth, Cid strode out to the shop entrance and pulled open the door to Sora and Riku.  
"...oh, it's you two."

"Cloud's home."

"Oh, really?"

Sora nodded. "He's still healing up, and there's still some time before Leon comes back too. He needs this time to think, adjust, get ready for what's coming."

Cid shrugged. "Hell, it's been weeks and weeks; the dog staying for a few more won't matter."

"No, actually, he'd like Angelo back right away," Riku corrected. "We came by to pick him up."

Cid went silent, shifting from foot to foot restlessly. "...I see. So that's how it is."

"We would have called before we came by, but your line was busy-"

"So you want the dog now, eh? Take the dog, then."

Cid turned to where Angelo had followed him out and scooped the dog up, dropping him into Sora's arms. "There! Now get off my property before I hurt you!"

Sora and Riku were a little lost for words, then hurried out before the man could explode in their faces. "Uh...thank you! We're come by for the rest of the stuff late-"

"BEAT IT!"

"Thank you!"

In a hurry, the two boys dashed away from the shop and back toward Cloud's place. Watching them go, Cid slid the door shut again and went back inside.

He retreated back to his small kitchen pad, and looked down at the platter that he had taken out of the oven moments ago. The cheese sauce was already setting again into a rubbery consistence.

Groaning, Cid buried his face in his hand, sliding the palm slowly up and down as he breathed slowly.

"...I'm okay... I'm okay... It's just a dog...  
"Just an ugly dog..."

* * *

"Hey, Cloud! Look who's come home!"

Cloud looked up from where he had sat himself on the couch, and his expression brightened as Sora set down a familiar puppy on the floor.  
"Angelo! Angelo, come here, baby! Come on, sweetheart; come here!"

The puppy looked up at Cloud and wagged its tail, but remained down in the spot that Sora had set it upon.

The three watched the little animal and waited, then Sora hurried inside and fetched out a new box of dog treats from the kitchen. Cloud took the box gratefully and grinned at Angelo's nonchalant form.  
"I know what you want...!"

Opening the box, Cloud reached inside and took out a small dog biscuit holding it out in Angelo's site, whistling to the pup as he did so.  
"Come on, now! Where's my little boy? Come here, Angelo!"

The dog didn't even bother to raise its head this time as it stared in another direction.

Cloud's face fell as he slowly withdrew the biscuit, the confusion evident on his face.

"...how about I bring him over?"

"No, no, don't...don't force him."

Sora carefully sat himself down on a different seat, a small distance away from Cloud. Riku remained near the door, staring at the unresponsive dog on the floor nearby.

"...sorry, Cloud."

Cloud didn't answer for a while, still staring at Angelo as his expression went blank and dull again.  
"...damn it, what happened...?"

No one could really answer.

* * *

_**Can't say I didn't have fun in Ontario; I was just tired, I guess. I apologize for taking as long as I am, and I wish I could do something more about my commitment.**_

_**Perhaps this is why I never really had a girlfriend... I didn't just say that out loud.**_

_Niana Kuonji_: As the story goes, this happens; sorry if it seems fast, but this does not serve as the main plotline, but a necessity for the story to go on.

_Silent Scope_: Yes, here we are.


	7. As Good As It Gets

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**And onward we go. With each step I take, I'm scared of screwing up so bad, I keep going back to the not-so-final screenplay of As Good As It Gets...now that I think of it, I understand and appreciate why HW keeps borrowing that DVD as she does.**_

_**I tried some research, I mentally replay scenes while I'm trying to sleep, and I feel so blank and shagged out.**_

_**What a great day this is.**_

* * *

It had been days since Cid remembered what it was like to be energetic. Now, he was just lethargic, grumpy, sick of everything.

Plus, Aeris was late. Again.  
If he didn't know better, someone was scheming against him, somewhere...

Then the door to his shop slid open, and heavy footsteps resonated across the flooring as someone approached the table.

"About _time_ you got here," Cid muttered from under the car he was working on.

There was no answer, but the small insignificant sounds of rustling cash notes and creaking drawers could be heard. Then the heavy footsteps again as their owner moved to the door.

"Ain't ya taking my stuff out?" Cid reminded hotly.

"Why the heck would I do that?" a low, confused voice replied.

Cid nearly banged his head against the bottom of the car before he scrambled out to look at the delivery person. Looking back down at him was not Aeris, but her fellow worker Johnny.

"Where's Aeris!" Cid demanded.

Johnny looked irritated, but answered anyway. "She's considering getting a job closer to home; probably not coming back. I'm filling in for her until we get a replacement."

Cid blanched white, sputtering a little.  
"What the crap are you trying to do to me?"

Now Johnny was both irritated and confused. "Heck do you mean?"

"Look here, wash-up lover boy, call her or something...just let her do my one meal here; I'll pay whatever. I'll wait."

"I don't think you understood me-"

"_Do it!_"

Johnny stood there, stunned. Then his face darkened dangerously, and he strode back toward the table and slammed the money back into the drawer before grabbing the box and striding back toward the door.

It was Cid's turn to be confused. "What are you doing?"

"I'm leaving. From now on, forget about ever calling our cafe again - we will _not_ serve you or put up with your attitude any more."

Realizing how drastic the situation had become, Cid fumbled for the right words to use hastily.  
"I-I'll be quiet. Just let me wait. No problem. Just get her here - have her bring my usual lunch order. I'm not a prick here - I'm a _great_ customer. This day - these few days - has been a disaster. I can't handle this, too."

"The world does _not_ revolve around _you_, Mr. Highwind!" Johnny snapped back. But at least he had stopped for the moment.

"...then could you at least give me an address? A number? Her last name?"

Johnny turned to say something when he noticed that Cid had clambered out from behind the car and was now right up in his face. "See here-"

"...could you just freakin' _help me?_" Cid finally blurted out, dropping his hands downward in exasperated desperation.

Johnny stopped talking, and so did Cid. For a moment, neither knew what to say - what should really be said in this precarious situation.

Cid sighed; it had been such a lousy time. "I get it. See ya."

"...mind if I use that pen and paper? I'll write it down for you."

Cid watched as Johnny carefully replaced the box on the table, then scribbled something down onto the semi-clean scrap of notepad. Ripping it out, he handed it to Cid, took back the money from the drawer, and was gone.

Cid looked down at the slightly crumpled, slightly dirty note. He looked at the half-open drawer, where his leftover money lay untouched. He looked at the box on the table, the smell of food escaping from it.

"...what if this is as good as it gets?" he asked.

He got no answer.

* * *

_**Ring-ring!**_

"I'm coming!"

The black-stained cloth and thermometer still in hand, Tifa hurried to the door and yanked it open.

There stood a disgruntled looking blond carrying a crumpled dirty note and chewing on a straw.

"Where's Aeris? I'm hungry. She's upset my whole day. I haven't eaten."

Tifa opened her mouth to say something, but the man wasn't done.

"This is not a sexist thing - if she were a delivery boy, I would still be here saying-"

"_Who the heck are you?_" Tifa finally blurted out, cutting him short in his rant.

At that point, Yuffie looked in from her room, catching sight of the commotion at the door.  
"Hi, Mr. Highwind!" she called, then slipped back in as she called to the other side of the hall. "Aeris; Mr. Highwind's here!"

"_What?_" came Aeris' incredulous cry.

Moments later, Aeris joined Tifa at the door, her face a mixture of surprise and confusion.  
"What are you doing here? At the door of my private home, no less!"

Cid held his hands up in a pacifying gesture, though his facial expression chimed a different tune. "I'm trying to keep emotions out of this, see. Even though this is an important issue to me, and I got some strong feelings about the subject."

"_What_ subject? That I wasn't there to hear you beat off to yourself and bring you sausages in cheese sauce?" Aeris protested, irritation slowly creeping into her tone. "Cid, do you have any control over how creepy you allow yourself to get?"

Cid lowered his hands, nodding. "Yes, I do. As a matter of fact...and to prove it, I have not gotten personal, and you have."

There is a moment of silence - a wordless compromise.

"Why aren't you at work? You're not sick - you don't look sick-" Cid paused to look from one lady to the next. "Neither of you do. You're both just very tired and very bitter."

"My boy is sick, alright? She's helping me."

That said, Tifa excused herself and moved to dump the ice back into the sink. At that point, a young boy sluggishly moved out from a different room, his hand over his forehead as he peered in.

"...Tifa?"

"Sorry, Denzel; I'll be right with you."

Denzel looked away from Tifa at the sink and up at Cid, who had now stepped halfway through the door. Cid looked back at him.

"How ya doing?" Cid asked uncomfortably.

Denzel was silent, solemnly staring up at the older man.

Miffed, Cid continued speaking. "You should answer when someone talks to you-"

Tifa looked right miffed herself at this point.

"Alright, Cid Highwind, that's about it," Aeris quickly spoke, firmly pushing Cid backward out the door as she moved to shut it. "Thank you for stopping by, but I'm not sure I can handle you teaching any of the kids manners."

As the door closed, Denzel groaned and pressed his hand a little harder against his forehead. Tifa noticed instantly.

"Let me see that."

Reluctantly, Denzel took his hand away, showing pitch-black staining his palm and sticking to his fingers.

"...head hurts," he mumbled.

"Not good."

* * *

"Damn people...of all places to feed the birds...!"

Sidestepping away from a young couple feeding a chorus of white chocobos, Cid hailed an approaching cab. As it pulled up, Aeris and Tifa came running out, Tifa carrying Denzel.

"_Cid, wait!_"

The chocobos paused their eating for a brief moment as they picked up the chant in unison like a flock of parrots.  
"Cid, wait! Cid, wait! Cid, wait!"

"_Shut up, you fiends!_" Cid hollered back at the chocobos, causing the lot to spread wings and fly away in a white flurry. The young couple looked surprised, then disappointed as they moved on.

Tifa and Aeris soon caught up to him.

"Cid, we need a lift; got some friends at the lodge to meet."

Taken aback, Cid dumbly nodded and opened the door, Tifa wasting no time in sliding into the back seat. Cid hesitated for a moment, then went around to take the front seat.

"I owe you the cab fare!" Aeris called from the sidewalk, already starting to move back toward the apartment.

Cid paused in the doorway. "...any chance you'll get back to work today?"

"_NO! Get in that cab!_"

Not thinking to disobey, Cid hurried to get himself seated, and the cab sped away.

* * *

Huddled by the front door, Angelo listlessly stared up at it, his back to the living room where Cloud and Sora were seated on the couch.

"I feel terrible that I have to... Cloud?" Sora looked up at Cloud, who was staring at Angelo's furry brown-and-white back. "Cloud, could you leave the dog for a second?"

Cloud quickly turned his attention back to Sora in a forced manner. "Sorry...what are those cards?"

Sora looked back down at the flash cards in his hand, now a bit embarrassed about the whole issue. "It was Riku's idea - he thought I should have notes, so I did this right; maintained focus, didn't get emotional, and tried not to terrify you..."

Cloud promptly paled, his good hand squeezing the armrest reflexively.

"See, he's right; I need these cards..." Sora trailed off as he looked down at the card before him. Taking in a deep breath, he read from it.  
"Cloud, you and Leon are broke.

"The show didn't go well, and the overall sum for both the medical bills and the damages add up to-"

"Stop there for a moment, please."

Sora waited as Cloud caught his breath and regained his composure.

"...thanks. Just...skip the figures and go on."

Nodding, Sora shuffled the card to the back and read from the next one.  
"I've tried to speak with both Leon's father and his grandfather. Mr. Leonhart has agreed to do whatever he can, but Mr. Loire's secretary said he was busy-"

"I did not expect any different, I guess," Cloud interrupted quietly, struggling to suppress his emotions. Craning his neck around, he whistled to the puppy.

"...Angelo? What is it, snookums? What's wrong, you miss the tough guy? Well, _here I am, sweetheart!_"

Angelo jumped up and spun around, staring wide-eyed at Cloud as the man continued to boom with a strangely rough tone.

"_Happy to see me, you little pissant mop? How about another ride downtown in the paper bin?_"

Angelo drooped.

Cloud's face fell as well.  
"Oh, Hyne...I'm so sorry, baby; I didn't mean that..."

Angelo turned back to face the front door and dropped back down, whimpering softly.  
Cloud groaned and ran his good hand through his unkempt hair. Breathing in deeply, he straightened up slightly. "... Sorry."

Sora nodded in understanding.

"...we'll still be able to keep the apartment and studio, right?"

Sora promptly bowed his head as he went back to shuffling cards.

Cloud reached forward and took the whole stack from the smaller boy's hands and set them on the table, spreading them out on said table to look at them all. Finally, overwhelmed, he sank back into his seat.

"...wow..."

Sora carefully reached forward and took the stack back, no longer sure of what he was going to say.

Cloud turned to look at Angelo again. Then he pulled himself off the couch and crossed the living room to where the pup lay on the carpet.

"... I didn't mean it, boy..." he murmured, reaching forward to pet the dog.

Angelo shrunk into the carpet.

Cloud's hand remained suspended inches from the puppy's coat, then dropped back to his side as he sat down on the floor as well.

"Damn it, I really didn't..."

* * *

_**My boss asked me to sit down and meditate for a bit during my lunch break - something about consolidating my thoughts - I guess I'm starting to act too much like Mr. Nicholson for my own good.**_

_**I think I'm boned...**_

_**...alright, I'm done with the angst stuff, and should really get back to the plotlines.**_

_**Thanks to all who dropped in to take a peek.**_

_Niana Kuonji_: Thanks for the boost; I appreciate it.

_Shiri Matakami_: I'm glad you're enjoying yourself with this story; I'll do what I can.

_Anendee_: Now _that_ is quite a bit of encouragement. Thanks.

_bdsproductions_: I'll leave the passionate loving to the experts and stick with my lot in life, but thanks for your commentary. Every opinion counts.


	8. Take It Like A Trooper

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**I know I'm rushing here, but I feel guilty over my slump; I owe too many people too much. Plus, this is probably the one way I know of to convince me to get back to my assignment pile-up.**_

_**A man's gotta do...what a man's gotta do.**_

_**Also, thanks for your patience - I know not much has been said for Leon lately, but that was just how things went. Hopefully, this is a start to make up for all that absence.**_

* * *

Cid stared at the typewriter before him, slightly appalled and slightly intrigued at the same time.

Whoever kept such a dinosaur of a relic around anymore?

Picking up his screwdriver methodically, he angled it as though to start tweaking, then stopped and lowered it to the bench surface again. Getting up, he walked away from the bench, paused, then walked back and sat down. He picked up a different tool, then set it back down, got up, and walked out of the room.

"...freakin' hell."

Walking back in, he stopped at his phone. After a pregnant pause, he picked the receiver off the cradle and dialed a number. Holding the receiver to his ear, he waited.

"...yeah, it's me. I need a favor... What, you can do it, can't ya? ... I fix your relative's old stuff all the time, plus I don't overcharge him... Look, I need this. Just say, 'Cid, I'll try,' okay? ...thank you."

* * *

All it took was one phone call from Yuffie to cause Tifa to drop everything and hurry back home. Perhaps it would have helped her blood pressure if she had taken note about Yuffie's relaxed tone over the line.

She hadn't, and it didn't.

So when she burst through the door - nearly breaking it off the hinges - and charged into the house, she was flushed and in a panic as she charged at the older woman in white.

"Oh, you must be-"

"What? Please? Now? Tell me!" Tifa sputtered out while trying to catch her breath at the same time.

"-Ms. Lockhart. I'm Dr. Kadowaki-"

"Not your name - _what are you telling me your name for? Where is he?_"

"In the bathroom; he's fine."

At that point, Denzel emerged from said bathroom, showing no sign of pain. "Hi, Tifa. Did you know there are doctors who come to your house?"

"...no, I didn't," Tifa replies lamely, looking from the boy to the woman. "So why are you...?"

Then Yuffie and Marlene bounced in - Yuffie, for most part - from their rooms, looking rather excited.

"Tifa! You didn't tell us you got secret admirers!" Yuffie chirped, ignoring Tifa's blank look. "Looks like you've met the gift!"

"She's good," Denzel stated solemnly. "And I'm an expert on doctors."

"Stay out of this," Tifa replied gently, before giving her attention back to the woman. "Doctor?"

The woman nodded. "I'm an acquaintance of Cid Highwind."

"Who-? Oh, _him_."  
Tifa vaguely remembered their visitor of before. She'd have to have a word with Aeris about this.

"Cid tells me," the woman continued, "that I have to take great care of this guy, because your friend Ms. Gainsborough is urgently needed back at work."

"...oh," was all Tifa could manage out.

"What work does Ms. Gainsborough do?"

"She's a delivery girl in Traverse Town."

"I see."

"Dr. Kadowaki?" a voice called from the door Tifa had left open in her rush.

"Over here," the doctor answered.

Moments later, a nurse joined the group in the kitchen.

"Sorry I took so long - it was hard to find this place."

"It's fine; just tell the lab I'd like the report back today."

Taking a vial from the doctor, the nurse left again.

"Now then, Ms. Lockhart, I would like to speak with you for a moment."

Tifa just stared at her, an incredulous expression on her face.

"...you're going to get the results _today_?"

* * *

"So how long has he been having these problems?"

"Since I first got him a couple of years back; he was already sick then."

"Any blood tests done? Only in the emergency room, or when he is well?"

"Emergency room only."

"How about skin tests for allergies? Any tests for Geostigma?"

"None."

"No standard scratch test?"

"I asked - they said it's not covered in my plan, and not necessary anyway...should they have?"

"Well..."

Tifa slapped the table in anger. "Those f--king bastard pieces of shit!"  
Then she remembered herself and looked apologetically at Dr. Kadowaki.

The older woman only smiled gently. "It's alright; I think that's their technical name."

The two shared a much-needed laugh.

Then it was Tifa's turn for questions.  
"Once the tests come back, is there someone I can reach in your office for the results?"

"That would be me - here's my card."

"... Balamb Garden."

"That's right."

"Right..." Tifa put the card away.

"There's going to be a lot checked out, Ms. Lockhart, but there's one thing definite," Dr. Kadowaki continued. "Denzel is going to feel a great deal better from now on."

Tifa looked straight at Dr. Kadowaki, a smile of relief spreading across her face. At first, she was lost for words, then she finally just raised her hands in reverent submission.  
"... Doc!"

Then she got up, crossed the table and hugged Dr. Kadowaki tightly.

"_Thank you._"

Tifa finally released the doctor and sat down once more, serious again.  
"Listen, you have to let me know about additional costs - one way or another, we'll-"

"They're definitely considerable, but don't worry - Mr. Highwind wants to be billed."

"...what?"  
Tifa knew, then, that she really, _really_ needed to talk to Aeris when she got back.

* * *

The door to the apartment held open, Riku carefully pushed Leon's wheelchair into the apartment. Once inside, Leon took hold of the metal rings and wheeled himself in further, silent and brooding.

The others let him go, then Sora and Riku picked up their stuff as they got ready to leave.

"You guys going to be okay?"

"We'll try," Cloud replied, his eyes still lingering on Leon's back for a moment before reaching forward to pat Sora on the shoulder. "Anyway, thanks for everything. Forgive my recent crankiness, and I'll drop you a line as soon as things are back on track again."

Sora and Riku stepped outside.

Then they stopped as a thought occurred to them simultaneously.

"...what about Angelo?"

Cloud fell silent, then realized where this was going.

"... _No_."

* * *

Moments later, Cloud had given in. Not without a fight, but he had given in nonetheless.

Now he sat upon the couch once more, a phone to his ear and a list of names on the table. On that list, many names were scratched out.  
Not too far away in his chair, Leon stared out into empty air, his brows knotted together so tight, they looked like they were about to become one dark brown "V".

Cloud set the phone down on the table, and crossed out another name. Then he picked up the phone again and dialed another number.

"... Andre, I need some help, and you're the logical one to turn to... No! Not because I blame you for what happened. I hardly get how you can ever think that... No, I'm not being sarcastic. I guess because you hired the guy who did this you think... Look, Andre - I hate asking, but this money thing is ridiculously serious..."

Setting his pen down, he carefully ran his hand through his still unkempt hair - how long had it really been since he combed it, he could not recall.

"I understand...yes... No, I do... But...you know, you didn't even ask how much...no, you're right; not the point... Look, I gotta go... no, you shouldn't feel that way at all...take care, you, too...you, too... Goodbye."

Setting the phone down again, Cloud sighed as he buried his face in his good hand, his injured hand free from the sling but still wrapped heavily.

"...pal o' mine," he muttered bitterly.

Then there was a knock on the door, and Angelo immediately leapt up and scratched at said door, tail wagging.

Cloud stared at the sight, then walked over to the door and unlocked it. Leaving it that way, he turned and walked back toward his room.

Cid opened the door and looked from Cloud to Leon, for now ignoring the happy dog at his feet.

"...some mess they left on you - you look like-"

"Could you just _take it_...a little _easier_, Mr. Highwind?" Cloud countered darkly.

Cid fell silent.

"..._thank you_," Cloud replied, resuming his way toward his room. "If you'll excuse me, I'm not feeling so well."

"...this place smells like _shit_."

"_Please_, just leave."

"Where are all your queer party friends?"

"_GET OUT OF HERE!_" Cloud finally shouted, his voice slightly choked with bottled up emotion. "...there's nothing worse than feeling this way in front of you..."

More silence reigned. Shaking, Cloud entered his room and moved to close the door.

"... Nellie, you're a disgrace to depression."

Cloud whirled around, his eyes burning with anger.

"_Rot in hell, Cid Highwind,_" he growled.

The door slammed shut.

Cid fidgeted, not entirely sure what to do, then he called in the direction of Cloud's room again. "No need to stop being a lady; quit worrying. You'll be back on your knees in no time."

Then hard metal footrests swiftly rammed into the back of Cid's ankles, effectively knocking him off his feet and onto Leon's. The man did not stop there, proceeding to grab Cid and roughly shove him against the wall, his fist coming up again.

In a panic, Angelo started barking at them.

Leon was halted in his tracks, though only for a moment. Then he reached down and seized a fistful of Cid's shirt before bringing the man up into his face.

"...is this fun for you?" he growled.

Cid gave him no answer.

Leon managed a dark laugh, but did not let go of the man.  
"You lucky devil...it just gets better and better, doesn't it?  
"We're losing our apartment. Everyone's telling us to beg my big president of a _father_ - the one man I don't want to talk to - for _help_... We don't want to do this anymore; we don't want to carve _shit_ anymore. So the life we were trying for...is _over_; the life we had is _gone_, and we're feeling so damn sorry for ourselves, it is difficult to _breathe_.  
"This is _high_ times for you, isn't it, Cid? The _gay neighbors_ are _terrified_. _TERRIFIED_!"

Dropping Cid to the floor, he slowly spun his chair around and maneuvered himself back to his spot in the living room. He was silent again, but the tension in the air, now, was so thick it could be diced for thanksgiving.

Cid looked down at the puppy who had hurried to his foot. Then he picked it up and moved carefully toward Cloud's door, as though he were treading on broken glass, all the while sending paranoid glances in Leon's direction.

Finally, he was before the door. Sending one more glance in the man's direction, he turned the knob.

The door was unlocked, and swung open for him.

"Get out," Cloud muttered, sitting on his bed with his face buried in his hand, the other resting on his knee.

Cid closed the door behind him and set the dog down. Angelo whined slightly, looking from one man to the next.

"...I was...just trying to give you kids a boost, s'all..." Cid managed uncomfortably.

Cloud snorted. "Well, lucky you; you're here for rock bottom...you absolute horror of a human being."

Cid sucked air through his teeth, then made his way across the room to where Cloud sat. Unsure about pulling up a chair, he settled for standing.

"Well, I'll do one thing to cheer you up."

"Go away."

"Don't piss on a gift, tough guy. You want to know why the dog's acting that way? It ain't about the affection; it's a trick."

Cloud looked up curiously as Cid pulled something from his pocket.

Sausage and bacon strips in a zip-lock bag.

Cloud looked at Cid, unconsciously choking out a laugh. "Great Hyne...!"

Smug, Cid passed the bag to Cloud. "Here you are; we'll both call him. You'll see, it's all just a trick."

Carefully pulling one of the sausages out, Cloud held it up to Angelo, whistling.  
"Come on, Angelo. Come here."

Angelo looked at Cloud, then at Cid. Cid gave the dog a look, gesturing as discreetly as he could to Cloud.

Angelo took a step forward, then walked up to Cid. Then it sat itself right in front of his feet, and pawed at his ankle, tail wagging.

Cid grunted and looked away, trying to ignore the animal as it whined up at him.  
"I don't get it...it's just a stupid dog...!"

Cloud stared down at Angelo. Finally, he withdrew the sausage and replaced it in the bag.  
"...could you leave now?"

Cid's expression was genuinely apologetic as he moved to go, the dog watching him quizzically.

Exiting the room, Cid opened the front door and stepped out, closing it carefully behind him.

Silence reigned once more.

* * *

_**That should about do it for the sob-stories. Hopefully, I'll be able to make the rest a little lighter.**_

_**I hope.**_

_**Have a nice day, all.**_


	9. Change of Air

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**And here's the next update: as it turns out, either I've finally got an epiphany, or else I've regained my senses to a neat.**_

_**Apologies for the long wait - I nearly threw myself into a corner with all the plans I had out before me.  
Something about "when you got to go, you got to go".**_

_**And yes, I did happen to watch **Lion King 1½ - Hakuna Matata**. That was fun.**_

_**Extra note: While widening my circle of beta-readers, I was requested by one of them to explain why I spelt Aerith's name with an "s" in this story, yet with "th" in my other Kingdom Hearts fan-fiction.  
When I first started on this, I was looking at the English translation which came directly from the American dub, thus the American spelling. Later, when I acquired more background knowledge and managed a few videos of Advent Children, I discovered the original spelling. However, for the sake of consistency, I will not change the spelling of her name. I apologize for the confusion.**_

* * *

The clock read three-twenty-two.

Three-twenty-two AM.

Cid stared at the obnoxious digits for a little longer, then set the clock back on the table with a muttered oath.

Rising from his mattress, he shuffled into the bathroom.  
Two seconds later, he exited the bathroom and plopped back down onto the mattress.

"...so it wasn't a freakin' call of nature..." he muttered.

He got up again, and fidgeted restlessly before leaving his sleeping quarters again. This time, he set himself down in his work office.

The typewriter was still there.

Staring at the confounded antique for a few more minutes, Cid swore and got up yet again. Disappearing into the kitchen pad, the sound of the fridge door opening and closing could be heard.

With the push of a button, the microwave oven door popped open. Setting a small cardboard bucket inside, he set the timer.

"If it don't explode in my face, it's safe," he decided.

The microwave appeared to agree on similar lines.

* * *

There was a knock on the door, and Angelo was up on its feet almost immediately.

Reluctantly, Cloud crossed the room and unlocked the door, opening it.

"Took a chance you boys were up," Cid explained, holding up the cardboard bucket. "Brought you some Chinese soup."

"Oh...thanks..."

Taking the bucket, Cloud walked back in, leaving the door open for Cid.

As Cloud disappeared into the kitchen, Cid crossed the living room to where Leon was still in his spot, still looking at nothing in particular. The only thing different, was that the tension had subsided - the young man was no longer infuriated, but simply bitter and disgruntled.

"Okay, if I sit here?"

Leon did not answer.

Cid sat anyway, a heavy sigh escaping his lips as Angelo settled at his feet.

The two men sat across one another, silent and brooding - an uncomfortable, uneasy silence.

"I have never been so tired in my life," Cid muttered, breaking that silence. Leon continued to stare into space, showing no sign of listening.

Cid continued his one-man confessional.  
"I haven't been sleeping... I haven't been clear, or felt like myself. I'm in trouble...some son of a bitch is burning my freakin' bridges behind my back. But the tiredness...boy..."

Then another voice chipped in, barely above a mumble.  
"...sick...nauseous..."

"...not just sleepy..." Cid went on.

"...everything looks distorted..."

"...everything inside just aches..."

"...and you can barely find the will to complain."

"...yeah..." Cid looked up at Leon, his expression brightened.

Leon's head was turned slightly in his direction, his eyes trained on Cid. For once, he did not look like he wanted to kill the older man and dispose of the body in twelve different locations.

Something had just happened. A sense of familiarity. A sense of community. It was something neither had really felt before, and neither knew how to take it from there.

Finally, Cid rose to his feet and nodded, more for his own benefit.  
"I'm glad we did this... Good talking to you."

Giving Leon an awkward pat on his shoulder, Cid hastily turned and walked out the door.

Leon stared after him, then exchanged a confused look with Angelo, who had been left on the floor throughout.

Cloud came in at that point, the soup poured out into bowls. His eyes scanned the room carefully, then finally settled on Leon's figure.

"...where'd he go?"

"Home."

* * *

"He _what? _... I need to sit down..."

Aeris looked right confused and uncertain as she did just that, observing the wood grain on the kitchen table. Tifa sat across from her, patiently waiting to continue. It took a few minutes of blank staring before she got the nod to go ahead.

"He's _your_ regular customer, and that makes him - as Yuffie says it - _your_ 'secret admirer'. I thought it was only right to fill you in."

"Thank you; I appreciate that," Aeris replied, the uncertainty having taken a long-term residence upon her face for the time being. Then she shook her head. "Look, Tifa, the man behind this...well, Cid's a seriously goofy man. That fact can not, and will not, be blocked out."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Tifa answered, "but Aeris... I do _not_ want to go back to the runt doctors in Emergency who keep telling me they can't help."

"Tifa, I understand, but... No matter what, I'm still on your side. It's just that this is going to open the gate and let a crazy man walk into our lives; are you sure you're fine with that?"

Aeris waited for Tifa's answer; it didn't take all that long to come out.

"... I'm not going to fight when the result is right in front of me, and this isn't like stocking or a string of pearls that I can dump back in the box and pretend I never saw it. If this can help Denzel, I'm willing to give it a try. I know it's selfish, but I want to say it anyway: we can't just send this one back. _I_ can't just send this one back.  
"Please Aeris, just this once, let's not send this one back."

* * *

Moments later, the typewriter was fixed, cleaned up, and shining like new.

A phone call - and some minutes later - its owner came to pick it up.

Cid sat at the now bare workbench, scratching at his five o'clock shadow he had left unshaved. Shaking his head in defeat, he chuckled.

Who would have thought...?

He checked his clock again, then set it back down.

He'd have to go back up there and walk their dog in a couple of hours.

* * *

It was some time in late evening when Yuffie walked into the kitchen to find Aeris and Tifa sitting by the table and writing, a stack of paper between them. Approaching, she picked up one of the top sheets.  
"What are you writing?"

"Thank-you note; we're almost at the last page," Tifa answered distractedly, before shaking her head. "I keep forgetting; how's 'conscience' spelt again?"

"C-o-n-s-c-i-e-n-c-e," Aeris informed, not looking up from her own sheet of paper. Tifa nodded her thanks and wrote it down.

Yuffie looked from one to the other, then poked them in the shoulder. "Hey, I think I can handle Marlene and Denzel for a couple of minutes; how about getting some air?"

Tifa batted Yuffie's finger away. "You know how we feel about leaving you kids by yourselves; anything could happen."

Yuffie didn't back down, but kept her fingers to herself this time. "Denzel's okay; it wouldn't hurt for you to have something else to do in your free time. You got a lucky break - step out a little!"

"Yuffie, we're not going anywhere."

Yuffie huffed, strutting and pumping her arms. "How about I call Mr. Highwind and ask him to send in a shrink or two?"

"_Yuffie!_" Aeris cried out in exasperation, finally looking up from her paper. "And on that subject, we don't need one; we know what's really going on here. Now let us finish this letter before we go criminally insane."

Yuffie fell silent, then pulled up a chair for herself and sat down. She stared from one to the other, waiting.

And it was Tifa who broke down first. Dropping her pen she propped her elbow against the tabletop, and her forehead against her palm.

"Look, I... I just don't know. It's strange not feeling that stupid panic thing inside you all the time. And without that, you just start thinking about yourself...and like _that_ does anything for anybody..."

Aeris stopped writing as well, setting her own pen down to listen with full attention.

"... It's like all this while I had no clue that things were going in the wrong direction...away from when I remembered what things were like before...before all _this_."

"It's okay, Tifa; Denzel's doing fine. You're just frustrated and worked up-"

"Look, I'm _tired_, _okay_? Just _why_ are you doing this? What is it that you _want_? What's _with_ you? _What is it?_"

Yuffie didn't twitch, and as Tifa calmed down she reached over again and took her hand.

"I want you two to go out, get some fresh air, and get away from everything for fifteen minutes."

When neither answered straight away, she grinned. "Hey, I'm a big girl now! I can do this!"

Tifa managed an exhausted smile and finally nodded her consent. "...okay."

* * *

It was almost dark when Cid returned to the apartment with Angelo following eagerly, little tail swishing as the man reached down to unhook the leash from its collar.

"... There ya go, little nit. Reckon your mom and dad are sleeping, so I'll go fix your dinner before I disappear, eh?"

In answer, the puppy stepped away and shook its fur out. Cid grunted and got to his feet, slapping dust off his hands.

Then there was a loud "thump" from down the hall, and Cid froze for a half-second, looking cautiously back outside. The dog looked up, wagged its tail, and trotted over to its empty bowl, looking quizzically back at Cid and wondering why the man wasn't going into the kitchen.

Cid hung at the door for a few more minutes before dismissing the feeling of paranoia. Pulling off his gloves, he stepped toward the kitchen.

Then a big hand grabbed his shoulder and spun him around.

Cid nearly had a heart attack when he found himself face to face with what looked like Leon's future many tens of good years down the road. Even scars were present, those these were situated strictly across the left side of the man's face.

But that pissed-off look was unmistakable as a glove-covered finger shot out and pointed at him.

"_Where are they?_"

"...uh?" was all Cid managed out before he had the feeling of getting rattled like a...well, like a rattle.

"I said, _where are they?_"

At this point, Angelo squeaked and fled under the couch, the tail barely sticking out.

The door swung open, revealing Cloud and Leon to be very much awake. Leon's eyes widened in shocked recognition as Cloud wiped sleep from his.

"What's going on out t... _Granddad_!"

* * *

_**Disclaimer - The character Pride Leonhart is under the unofficial writer's ownership of Flypipe, recent new member to and Howling WereWolf's comrade-in-pens.**_

_**I apologize to all readers for the delay in update. I initially wanted to get it done at least a month ago, but I allowed myself to overcomplicate Pride's entrance; I guess I just plain suck at writing in originals. And for further excitement, neither Howling WereWolf nor Flypipe wish to review; Flypipe has recently washed his hands of the matter, and asked me to leave it all up to the infamous Writer's Whim. Something about utter craziness with Video Production projects and other stuff leaving him too overwhelmed to see my work.  
Thus, I appeal to you, readers, for any feedback at all regarding how I am doing.**_

_**Thank you all for your support thus far.**_

_bdsproductions_: Well, that's the red-light district, I guess. I'm amazed how people acquire the skills to write that stuff - it's like _literature_. No offense.

_Shiri Matakami_: Cid the stalker... Score!

_Angstluver_: Well, I'm just glad I didn't take as long as I expected myself to.

_Niana Kuonji_: Sorry for the drag, but here's the update. With all this angst going on, I can only hope to do As Good As It Gets justice as I go along.

_Ashti_: Glad to have you with us, and hope you get enough rest; getting sick from lack of sleep is like a stick up the butt.  
And I'm the little prodigal son who doesn't practice what he preaches, but you didn't hear me say that.

_scarlettHuntress_: I'm glad you like it. Sorry about all the angst - really whacks hard against that Fruits Basket story I finished some years ago. As Good As It Gets is quite the movie, with Mr. Nicholson at his sardonically humorous best, but that's just me.

_koyuki-san_: I love that movie; the very first time I saw it inspired me to try something like it. If I remember the ending correctly, Simon moved in with Melvin, and they pretty much share the dog. Well, this is supposed to be some kind of turning point, so less angst is expected.


	10. Road Trip

_**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf._

_**After what I did in Chapter 9, I couldn't bring myself to end it there. Hurts my conscience.**_

_**Funny, how the word "conscience" is spelt: con-science. Like we're swindling logical reality or something.**_

* * *

"...don't get it wet, Johnny."

"Sorry, you know how emotional I get," Johnny mumbled, absent-mindedly brushing the paper clean.

"...it can't be _that_ tear-jerking," Aeris countered, carefully taking the paper back.

"You almost have me liking the guy!" Johnny exclaimed in his defense, his hands moving awkwardly like he did not know what to do with them. "I mean...you just came straight from the heart, I...that is, I never knew...what you and Miss Tifa...what you two went through with everything..."

"We wanted him to know how much this favor means to us. Is his order ready?"

"It's right here."

Taking the box from Johnny, Aeris stepped out of the cafe and turned the corner.

* * *

When it wasn't Aeris, but another familiar face that stepped into the shop, Cid caught himself before he could dive for a weapon in defense.

The older man promptly stopped and held his hands up in a pacifying gesture. "Hey...uh...Highwind, right?"

"Who do I look like, Snow White?"

The older smirked as he commented: "point taken." Then he narrowed the distance to a more respectful measurement. "Sorry about last night; I thought you were another violent burglar trying his luck."

"Uh, sure, no prob-wait a minute, you thought I was a...?" Cid turned red with indignation.

The man rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly before sticking the hand out again. "Pride Leonhart; I'm Leon's grandfather."

Cid nodded and shook his hand. "So...what can I do for you?"

"I like a straightforward fellow. Let's talk, then."

"I've only got one chair in here."

"Floor's fine."

"Want a drink?"

"Heck, if it's strong."

As the two men squatted on the floor with the bottle between them, Aeris opened the door and entered. Cid stood again as she came up to him, then look dumbfounded at the envelope she held out to him.  
"...what's this?"

"A thank-you note," she answered. "For what you did for us."

"Um...no."

It was Aeris' turn to be dumbfounded. "...'no'?"

"No thank-you note... Thank you but...uh...no thank-you."

Awkward, confused and a little embarrassed, Aeris withdrew the envelope and retreated to the bench to take out his food.

Leon's grandfather stared in mild surprise at the exchange, then smirked as Cid squatted again. "Nice girl," he commented.

"Really nice," Cid muttered in agreement, popping open the bottle and taking a drink from it. "...ain't that a good thing to tell someone - 'no thanks required.'"

This time, Pride choked on a laugh. "Well, you've sure been playing the good Samaritan lately; Cloud tells me you've been walking their dog, and just yesterday, you brought him soup. Want me to stop _him_ from bringing you a note?"

"You wanted to talk, didn't ya? Get on with it," Cid muttered gruffly, unused to the compliment sent his way.

The older man sobered quickly and grazed the fuzz on his face lightly with the pat of his thumb. "Yeah, that...it's about the kids. I know you've been helping with the dog, and now there are other things. I'm their granddad; I'm just as concerned about them as you are."

"'Concerned'? Ha! I'm just their freakin' hall monitor."

Allowing the comment to slide, Pride continued. "It's not only financial assistance, here...see, I'm flying them down to Esthar City to ask my son-in-law for money... Won't be happening over the phone."

"Yeah, rules of life," Cid agreed, "if the parent ain't dead, he's got to help. Good."

"Yep. Well, see, my techie booked out on me; I was wondering if I could hire you instead.  
"Can you come? The thing's huge; plenty of room if you want to bring company."

Cid sent him a dirty look. "Clean your dentures and get serious."

"I came in a freakin' uninsured _airship_; I can't fly all the way back to Esthar without some backup ready. You can fix up an airship mid-flight, right?"

"Granddaddy-o, I can fix anything with my eyes shut, _but I'm not doing it!_"

"You forgot to restock your lunch money drawer, and you're scaring the chocobos," Aeris informed as she returned. Outside the window, a flurry of white accompanied by panicky squawks shot diagonally upward.

Cid snorted as he pulled out his wallet and handed over a few bills. "This old git wants me to sit in his bird just in case it falls out of the sky."

"Cid Highwind, I want your life for a minute, where my big problem is getting a free ride in an airship so I can get out of this city. Excuse me."

As she walked off to get his change, both men stared after her with different degrees of surprise on their faces. Pride snapped out of it and chuckled.  
"She's got good aim; right below your belt," he commented. Then he got up to leave.

"...okay, I'm coming. Give me a holler when you're ready to leave."

Pride did not hide his surprise, nor his relief as he nodded.

Cid grunted and waved him off in form of dismissal. "So I'll see you tomorrow. Let's not drag this out; we don't like each other all that much."

Pride stared at Cid for a second, then strode away while shaking his head in amusement. "Highwind, if there's some mental health foundation that raises money to help people like you, be sure to let me know."

"Last word freak," Cid muttered after him.

Passing the bench, Pride waved casually to Aeris without breaking stride. "Good day and good luck to you, miss."

Aeris watched him go with a puzzled expression.

Cid picked up the bottle, crossed over to the bench and set it down. "I'm going to hitch a ride with my queer neighbors and their commando grandfather to the Eastern Continent."

"Sounds like fun," Aeris commented dryly.

"Hey...um...what I did for your roomie - how's it working out?"

"What you did just changed all of our lives," Aeris replied steadily as she promptly produced the envelope again, breaking the seal and pulling out the papers.

Cid looked uncomfortable as he backed up a step. "I already said, no thank-you notes."

"Cid, this note you're refusing to read dictates the entire history of mine and Tifa's life, that somehow you've done more for Tifa, Denzel, Marlene, Yuffie and me, than anyone else ever has.. And that makes you the most important, surprising, generous person I've ever met..."

"Whoopee," Cid stated, getting even more uncomfortable at Aeris' outpouring emotion.

Aeris, not really paying attention as she read from the letter, flipped to the last page. "I also wrote one part... I wrote I'm sorry, when I pushed you out the door when you told Denzel that he ought to answer back, that I'm sorry for getting personal at the door..."

"Uh..." Cid finally reached forward and carefully took the papers from her hand. "I'll read the rest of it in a moment... Nice of you...thanks...  
"Now I want you to do something for me."

Aeris looked at him for a very strange, long beat. "...and that would be?"

"I want you to go on this trip."

Before Aeris could say a word in her defense, Cid hurriedly cut in.  
"I can't do this alone; what if they get horny and jump on each other and everyone else? I need a woman's voice of reason - a chaperon to separate everything but vehicles. You said you liked airships, and now I'm on the hook."

"...they get what and _what_ now?"

"Two days."

"I can't; I have to work," Aeris protested.

"Johnny lets you take off when you have to," Cid countered.

"What about Denzel? Someone has to watch the kids if anything happens."

"Nothing's happening; Kadowaki tells me he's doing fine."

"Look, Cid, I'd rather not..."

"What's that got to do with it?"

"Funny, I thought that speaks for itself."

Cid snorted and waved at the air dismissively. "Write me a note, and ain't she sweet; I need a hand, where'd she go?"

Aeris frowned at this. "Are you saying accepting your help _obligates_ me?"

"Is there any other way to see it?"

"... No," Aeris finally conceded.

"Are you still coming?" Cid prompted.

"I'd like to know exactly where we're going."

"Esthar City; just a nice quiet high-tech place apart from the rest of the world."

"Nothing dressy, right?"

"I'd preferred if you just asked me what the food is like."

* * *

"You're going _where_ with _who_?"

"I said, I'm going to play 'chaperon' for Cid Highwind, his neighbors and their grandfather on a trip to Esthar city, for the what-if where they get horny and jump on each other and everyone else."

"...they get what and _what_ now?"

"Exactly what I said, too."

"Sounds like fun."

"I doubt it; he's just going to keep beating off to himself and saying those demented, sick, complaining, angry things to anyone listening. And I hate it when he does that; he's like a freak stalker."

"Maybe his friends are nice...?"

* * *

_**Well, that felt better.**_


	11. Drifting At My Pace

**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf.

I spent the last few minutes trying to think up an update for Musings. Then I gave up and came back to here; the difference between the two, is that this one already has a script for me to play with.

* * *

"Just fill these out, please."

Cid took the proffered pen and started filling out forms as the female counter staff gently picked up Angelo. The pup promptly went limp and played dead.

On opposite sides of the waiting room, a tiny Chihuahua and a large black lab cross sat patiently with their masters.

"Anything unusual in Angelo's diet?" the counter staff asked.

"No," Cid replied as he handed back the forms. Then he glanced at the other dogs, which prompted his next question: "Everybody gets their own kennel?"

"Certainly."

"Then put him in with that one," he pointed at the Chihuahua as he spoke.  
"Builds his self-confidence."

* * *

"... _This_ is your airship?"

An hour and a half after appointing a Chihuahua as Angelo's roommate for the next two days, Cid now found himself dwarfed by a very large aircraft.

Pride simply grinned smugly and patted the gleaming red hull. "Told you I'd take care of your Ragnarok for you, kid."

Leon did not answer directly, but looked up at the gargantuan draconian ship that now stood majestically in Traverse Town's port. Leaving the younger man to "catch up" on lost time, Pride grabbed tapped in the access codes, stepping back as a ramp slid out.  
"Yo, Highwind; quit gawking and help me with the luggage."

Cid snapped out of his awed stupor and grunted before grabbing a few bags and hauling them up the ramp.

Aeris arrived as the last of the bags made it inside; she too stopping to stare in wonder at the grand sight. Spotting her at the distance, Cid straightened up a bit and waved her over.  
"Hi. Thanks for being on time...uh...introductions, yeah. Aeris the delivery girl, these are the fags."

Then he took her bags and started carrying them inside as well, leaving Aeris outside with Leon and Cloud.

Cloud cleared his throat and held out his hand. "I'm Cloud; this is Leon."

"Hello... Holy Hyne, what happened to you?"

"Stabbed once, shot four times, nearly died," Leon answered sardonically.

Sending a glance of disapproval down at Leon, Cloud took pity on Aeris' expression of outright shock and confusion. He explained:  
"We walked in on people robbing us; they attacked us with our merchandise, and we were hospitalized for several weeks."

"Oh."

"We're behind time, here! Let's continue the small talk inside," Pride called from within the cockpit.

As the last of the passengers entered the interior, the ramp was recalled, and the engine revved up for take off. Moments later, they took to the sky.

Aeris looked out the window, admiring the grand view as she started talking.  
"I don't know the last time I've been out of Traverse Town; I've got to remember to bring back souvenirs with me... I'd better call in to check on Tifa and the kids soon."

"I'm sorry, I can't hear you; the engine gets too loud when we're achieving altitude; it'll calm down in a minute," Pride called from the pilot's seat. Shaking his head helplessly, he shouted over to Cid in the co-pilot's chair. "Can you tell her we can't hear her?"

"Doesn't matter; she's enjoying herself. Consider it 'music to the ears'."

* * *

A short time later, the passengers had retreated to the back of the cockpit. Leon, getting back into the game, had swiftly swapped places with Cid, and now sat at the co-pilot's seat up front with his grandfather, leaving a disgruntled Cid seated with the other passengers in the much quieter back.

At the moment, he was mercifully quiet, allowing Aeris to talk with Cloud in peace; the two were already making fast friends.

"I'm sure, Cloud, something really off must have happened for the two of you to feel this way. But when it comes to your partners or family, things will always be off for you unless you set it straight. Maybe this...incident...happened just to give you that chance."

"Non-_sense_!" Cid barked, leaning forward. "Want to know _why_?"

"Anyone here who's interested in what Cid has to say, raise their hands."

Cloud's eyes widened and he reached forward to push his injured hand further into his lap. Thus, the majority was declared.

Utterly defeated in the democrat way, Cid retreated from the conversation again with a snort.

For the following few minutes, not another word was said between any of them. Cloud looked cautiously to the front, where Pride and Leon were sitting in their own silence. Then he spoke up softly.

"Do you want to know what happened? I mean, with us and Leon's dad?"

Aeris' head promptly turned in his direction. "Yes, I would."

Cloud looked down as his good hand fiddled with the blonde spike in his hair. "Well..."

"Just a minute." Interrupting him for that brief moment, Aeris looked pointedly back at Cid.

"...what?" Cid managed to ask defensively.

"Don't say anything."

"What'd _I_ do?"

* * *

"Well... Leon and I have always known each other; we grew up together. I met him when we weren't even shaving yet, I think. We were enrolled in a military academy, and Leon's grandfather was one of the senior instructors at the time. Then, it was granted that Leon had no parents - Granddad raised him - which was fine; I didn't remember having any folks myself. Then I moved in with them, and Granddad started taking care of the both of us. It was good like that; we liked it."

"This stuff is _pointless_."

"You promised, Cid."

"You like sob stories? You want _mine_?"

Aeris sent the man a hard look before turning back to Cloud. "Go ahead. Really. Please. Don't let him stop you; ignore him."

"...okay.  
"Well, it was somewhere in our teens when I met Laguna - Leon's father. He was talking to us after classes one day, then he asked if he could meet our guardian. I thought it'd be an honor to have him come to our house, but the moment Granddad laid eyes on him, he told us to go to our room. We hadn't even shut the door yet when he started screaming something at Laguna; I'm still surprised the whole campus didn't come running to witness the commotion. Whatever it was he was yelling about, I can't remember exactly, but it was ugly to just watch-"

"_My_ folks didn't leave their house for eleven years, and my father used to hit my hand with a yardstick if I got anything below an A in engineering school," Cid butted in effectively. That earned him another hard look before he wisely chose to hold his peace for the next few sentences.

"Go ahead, Cloud. Pride was yelling something fierce and... Really, come on."

Cloud fidgeted a little nervously, then continued.

"We were both highly confused; we did not know why Granddad looked so angry, and we did not know why Laguna looked so apologetic. That's when it got too much for us, and we came out again to confront them. It was a mistake, that; it was a mistake for us to be even listening, because at that moment, Laguna said, 'I just want to do something for him; he's my son.'  
"I never saw Leon turn that pale before in my life. He just ran out of there and didn't return for the entire night, and when he finally came home in the morning, he was in denial. I think he still is.  
"After that, Laguna started to visit more often. Granddad had stopped yelling at Laguna since, but Leon refused to talk to him, and talked less with Granddad. They understood, and they let him be, but he continued to be so very angry.  
"We eventually graduated from the academy, and before we left, Laguna was over again. He came up to Leon and held out his hand, and it was filled with money - a big, sweaty wad of money."

Cloud paused to gather himself.

"He said, 'I won't be coming back, and whatever your decision, I'll respect it. Just promise you'll come find me if you ever need help.'  
"Leon would not answer him - he wouldn't take the money either, but Laguna just grabbed him and he hugged him. Then he turned and left the room, leaving Leon standing stiffly by his bag and unmoving.  
"Laguna passed the money to Granddad, and Granddad passed it to me. We were able to buy our apartment and studio with that money, but we just lost touch with both of them completely... Until now."

Aeris regarded him quietly, strangely moved by the truth behind the two men that had just been revealed to her, something more complicated than financial difficulties, sick children and arrogantly helpless doctors. Looking out the window, she kissed her fingers and touched them to Cloud's cheek - a nice, understated gesture of friendship.

"...thank you," Cloud answered.

"I'll stay what I said: the two of you have to get past it all when it comes to this, and preferably together; we all have bad experiences to get over."

Enough with being in the background, Cid nudged in again with his own words of wisdom.  
"Not true; some of us have _great_ stories - pretty stories that take place at lakes with chocobos and friends and fries in cheese sauce. Just not anybody in this big bird. But _lots_ of people, that's their story - good times, chocobos, fries in cheese sauce; that's what makes it hard: not that _you_ had it bad, but being that pissed so many had it good."

Cid nodded smugly as Aeris and Cloud both sent him an incredulous stare.

"No," Aeris finally answered.

"Not it at all, really," Cloud agreed.

"Not at all, huh?" Cid quipped with a veteran's irony. "Well then, _ladies_, why don't we see if Old Yeller up front is anywhere near Esthar City yet? Then maybe you'd get lucky tomorrow, and Daddy-in-law will pass him another big wad of sweaty money to pass to you."

* * *

"Two bedrooms, a sofa that opens, and the hotel is offering us a spare mattress," Pride helpfully informed as they acquainted themselves with the room they would be staying in for the time being.

The sound of the phone being hung up echoed from the small kitchen, and Aeris emerged from said room.  
"No answer; maybe we should just fly there tomorrow. Can I have that one?" She pointed at one of the bedrooms as she spoke.

"Yes...sure. Kids, you take the other room. I'll flip with Cid for the spare mattress."

"...that won't be necessary; I'll just take the damn sofa," Cid muttered, already parking his butt upon it. Pride shrugged, then got up to answer the door as the bell rang. Aeris disappeared back into the kitchen and picked up the phone, and dialed home again. Watching Leon retreat to the table with a book, Cid entered one of the two bedrooms, watching Cloud unpack from an impeccably neat suitcase.

"Can I ask you a personal question?"

As an answer, Cloud laughed in apprehension squared.

"Do either of you get..._that_ way...over a woman?"

Cloud promptly dropped his shirt back into the suitcase and turned around. "Look..."

"Wouldn't your life be a lot easier if you were not-"

"Cid, you consider _your_ life easy."

Cid conceded defeat quickly. "I give you that one... Nice packing, by the way."

Back out in the living room, as Pride hauled the spare mattress across the floor. Seeing his ticket out of the tight situation, Cid hurried to help him.

Aeris came back in as well, beaming widely.

"You will _not_ believe this; none of you will. Denzel was _outside_, and he was _racing_ with the other kids; I never saw him run before! Come on, you guys, let's go out for a good time; someone here take me dancing!"

"...dancing?" Cid asked carefully.

"I'll pass," Leon answered, looking rather awkward before this happy woman.

Aeris walked up to him and pulled up a chair next to him, meeting his eye-level in a more comfortable manner.  
"I understand; this is a monumental first day out. You sad or anything?"

Leon shook his head. Then he cleared his throat uncomfortably as he continued. "Thank you for talking with Cloud. Those past few days have been...rough. I don't know how I would have handled the situation if you weren't along."

"What a nice compliment; thank you."

As Aeris suddenly reached forward and hugged Leon, Pride and Cid simultaneously dropped the mattress on the floor with a loud "thump". Leon blinked, remaining rigid as he was released, then took a sudden interest in the book as he tried to make a hasty retreat from what he felt was a very strange and very awkward situation.

Aeris stood and walked up to the two older men who were debating over leaving the mattress where it was. They paused and looked her way.

"I'm happy," she stated, the smile still bright on her face. Then she dropped the other shoe. "Now get me out of here and let's hit the streets."

The two men looked at each, then Pride grinned. "Absolutely. Never mind about the mattress, Highwind; we're outta here."

"What about those two?" Cid retorted, referring to Leon and Cloud.

"The kids could use some alone time. Now go grab a button-up shirt that is reasonably clean."

* * *

**Shiri Matakami**: Perfectly understandable; we all have down times. Chapter 9 covers one of my favorite parts of the movie - the sparked, slowly growing feeling of community and comradeship between Simon and Melvin. I'm glad you liked it.

**JadeGem**: You reassure me with your...enthusiasm. Flypipe, I _know_ you're reading over her shoulder. Keep your book to yourself; Kenny's mother scared me more than you ever will. I take back the yelling (caps lock and all), but cut me some slack; I've got work as well. Makes me wonder why I'm allowing myself to divert my attention like this. Speaking of which, thanks for recommending My Pace by Sunset Swish. I have absolutely no clue what they are saying, but I feel better already just listening to the song.

**Niana Kuonji**: Sweet; guess I _can_ write original characters after all. That's right, we're finally crawling out of the hole and upward. Hope this chapter didn't disappoint you too much.

**Runkie**: Thank you, you overwhelm me with fuzzy emotions and leave me grinning even as I type this reply. I've always loved As Good As It Gets, and that's what inspired me to do this. I've been forced to divert slightly from the original storyline at several points due to my circumstances, but otherwise, the credit should really go to the ones who made that movie in the first place. Thanks for reviewing, anyway.


	12. Wronged Rights and Righted Wrongs

**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf.

I spent more time trying to think up an update for Musings; I nearly succeeded, and now I'm stuck with refining it properly before actually uploading it. I gave up once again and came back here. Sorry, one and all.

* * *

Later that same night found the three in one of the smaller restaurants with a bar.

"Y'know, when you said you knew of a nice place, I wasn't expecting this."

Pride shrugged at Cid's comment as he picked up his bottle.  
"I ate here all the flippin' time when I was talking things out with Mr. Important. Trust me, the food here's decent with a big fat 'D'; their horseradish is fresh ground."

Cid pointedly ignored the older man as he bit down into a burger. Pride set his bottle down and looked across the room for Aeris, finally spotting her, the sight causing him to smirk.  
"Here she comes, and here comes her martini."

Aeris came up to their table, a little giddy as music played and couples danced in the background. Then she noticed the waiter with her martini trailing after her, and reacted with equal amusement.

"How's our most fair maiden liking the location?" Pride asked when she took a seat.

"I've never had a drink follow me like that before; I could get used to this."  
Aeris paused to nod her thanks to the waiter as he set the glass down, before looking back at the men.  
"I'm stoked; either of you want to hit the dance floor?"

"Sorry, milady; rain check," Pride apologized. "I can't dance to save my soul, my firstborn kid or my car."

"You don't have a car," Cid pointed out behind his drink.

Pride laughed and set the bottle back down before rising from his chair. "Don't wait up for me; I'll be right back with the self-service."

Then he was off, leaving Cid and Aeris alone at the table.

Aeris looked back at the dance floor wistfully, then back at Cid. "Can you dance?"

"I've been thinking about that since you brought it up before."

"...and?"

"... No."  
Then Cid snorted and waved a hand dismissively at the surroundings. "... I don't get this stinkin' place. They make me and the Crusty Commando dress like penguins on a bad day, but they let you wear your house dress. I don't get this stink at all."

Aeris blanched, then reddened at the insult Cid had unintentionally sent her way. All in all, it was still an insult. She got up to leave.

It was then that Cid stopped acting nonchalant and got up as well.  
"No. Wait. What? Why? I didn't mean it. I mean, uh...you gotta sit down. You can still give me the dirty look, y'know. Just, uh...just sit down and give it to me."

Aeris did send him the dirty look, but she did not seat herself again.  
"Cid, give me a compliment... I need one and quick. You have just hurt my feelings, and I want to hear you say something nice."

Cid groaned and rubbed his pate in frustration. "One minute she's happy and loving everyone, and the next she's upset over a dress code comment," he muttered.

"That is _not_ a compliment, Cid; that's just trying to sound smart so I feel stupid. A compliment is something _nice_ about _someone else_."

"I know what a compliment is..."

"Well, I'm waiting."

"Alright; sit down."

Aeris obliged, the indignation still worn clearly on her expression as she gave him his chance for redemption.  
"And _mean_ it."

"...give me a sec; I wanna see if the old guy's coming back yet."  
Turning, Cid hollered down the room.  
"How long are you gonna take over there?"

"Give me a few good tens of minutes; they're just putting out the fresh condiments," the answer came back.

"Great; now I get to embarrass myself without a personal audience. I mean...um..."  
Cid slowly turned back around and inhaled deeply. When he exhaled, he nodded.  
"... Okay, I've got a real great compliment for you, and it's true."

"Suddenly, I am so afraid you're about to say something awful..."

"Don't be pessimistic; it's not your style. Okay, here I go, even if this is gonna cost me half my ego...

"You recall that day when you gave me that lecture about the snide remark I made about your roomie's kid? Yeah, I know you apologized for it an' all, but...uh...see, after you said that, I did a lot of thinking. About myself, about where I was going...well, about a lot of things. Then, well...you know what happened afterward; we don't need that history lesson..."

Aeris waited a little longer, then shook her head. "I don't quite get how that's supposed to be a compliment."

Cid sat up a little straighter and looked her in the eye as he explained himself carefully.  
"... You made me want to change my life that time...yeah...  
"... You make me want to be a better man."

Then there was a silence - save for the music and voices in the background - as Cid observed the surprise that had set in on Aeris' face.

"... Cid, that's maybe the best compliment of my life... Thank you."

Cid let out the breath he was holding. "Then I've _really_ overshot here, cos' I was aiming at just enough to keep you from leaving."

The two remained sitting there, watching the couples dancing for a little longer.

"... So tell me, why _did_ you come along? I saw that look on your face when I mentioned dancing...it was not that 'horny and jumping on each other and everyone else', again, was it?"

"... Well, no. That one was just to get you to come on the trip," Cid admitted gruffly.

"So what was it, then?"

"There are a lot of reasons...hell, I had a thought that if...well, he's old enough to be _your_ grandfather, but..."

"... _What? _You thought...I and Pride... You actually thought I would...?"

Cid stammered, realizing he had made his second foul in the same hour. "Yeah well, it was just an idea..."

"Cid, that is the most _revolting_-"

"Hey, c'mon, it was just an idea; at least you didn't stay back at the room with the two queers, right?"

"..._them too?_ Cid, just how many people did you pair me up with in three seconds of your attention span?"

"Look, I'm just sayin'-"

"Cid do you have _any_ idea what you _are_ saying? About me and about those men? How could you even _think_-"

"Look, it just occurred to me, s'all... It came out first... Hell, you kissed one, you hugged the other one, you got the really old one to invite you out on the streets...and I thought for a moment... But you don't want to...hey, that's fine... Look, forget what I said about it, okay? It was a freakin' mistake."

By now, Aeris was so incensed again, she looked on the verge of tears. "... I'll never forget you said it."

"It was a freakin' mistake, okay?"

"It's not okay; tell Pride I went back to the hotel."

Before Cid could stop her, she had stood up again and left.

At that point, Pride returned with a tray of freshly ground horseradish and several other condiments. As he set the tray down, he looked around.  
"... Highwind, where'd the lady go?"

* * *

Cloud was curled up under the sheets, already deep in slumber with a book hugged to his chest. Said book's owner was across from the bed and watching him, occasionally looking back at the kitchen, the hesitation evident.

He had promised Pride before he left - and Cloud before he fell asleep - he would at least try and call Laguna himself. He still hadn't; instead, he had gone through more items of distraction. Now, the table was littered with all the previous engravings - each without color - on metal plates that had once been considered practice scrap, and a few half-empty vials of color dye; all that was left of his lost career in weapon engraving.

Leon held up one of an angel, then laid it back down as he looked back into the kitchen, deep in thought. Finally, he gave up again and started to change into his pajamas. It was not without some difficulty, but Cloud slept like a log and would not be of much help here.

Just as he was getting out of his shirt, Aeris came bursting in. His eyes followed her as she entered her room. Then there was the sound of a suitcase being thrown open, then clothes and other articles being flung in roughly.

He remained in a stunned stupor with the shirt partially on as she suddenly entered their room with that same suitcase now filled with her luggage.  
"...hello?" he managed.

"I'm sorry, but I'd like to crash here for the night; I don't want to see him and he's not going to come knocking on this door."

"Who...oh... You'll have to bring the mattress in, though..." he conceded uncertainly.

"I'll do that in a minute. Here, let me help you with that shirt."

Leon did not say anything in protest, but flinched as she yanked hard on the shirt, effectively hauling it off him in under two seconds.  
"Can you not be violent?"

"I don't think so."

In several seconds after, the pajama shirt was on, and the experience with it.

"You need help with the pants?"

Leon's brows disappeared into his forelocks as he grabbed the metal rings of his chair and hurriedly wheeled himself backwards and out of reach.

Aeris let it slide as she tried to get a grip on herself. "I'm going to take a big bath and order a big meal. You want anything?"

Leon's grip tightened on the left ring as his other hand hastily snatched his pajama pants off the edge of the bed. "Uh...no...go ahead."

Aeris took a few more deep breathes to calm herself, then sent a regretful look his way.  
"I'm sorry, you didn't need that... Are you okay?"

Relaxing his stance, Leon answered the question.  
"Considering I can't voluntarily move my legs, I let all my responsibilities go to rot, and tomorrow I'm requesting financial assistance from the last man on Earth that I'd ever want to speak to..."  
He finally shook his head helplessly.  
"Don't ask me; I'm sick of my own complaints...got to get a new set of thoughts..."

Aeris looked up, curious. "Why? What have you been thinking about?"

"How to die, mostly."

"Can you believe, in our little mix, you and Cloud are the good roommates?"

Leon appeared slightly amused as Aeris crossed to the bathroom and began to prepare a bath. After some struggle with the pants, he headed for the other side of the room and hit the switch. The room dimmed toward darkness, save for the light from the bathroom.

That was when he turned, and his eyes promptly widened slightly.

There sat Aeris at the tub's edge, clothed in nothing save the towel wrapped around her. As his eyes remained burning into her back, she adjusted her long hair, and the towel slipped.

"... _Hold it._"

The words having barely escaped, he turned and hurried back toward the table. Knocking several of the metal plates to the ground, he finally pulled out the one he was looking for - the angel. Then he swiped as many vials as he could and came back to his original spot, slight pain from exerting his tender shoulder reflecting in his eyes.

Then, Aeris noticed she had an audience and turned slightly.  
"... What are you doing?"

"I have to use you as a theme."

"No, absolutely not," Aeris pointedly replied, carefully recollecting the towel around her, explanations blubbering.  
"I'm shyer than you think. I give the wrong impression sometimes, and-"

Already, Leon was holding up vial after vial to find the color match. "I haven't even been thinking about paint and dye for weeks."

"Stop staring. Do the hotel vase."

"Compared to you, that vase is a chipped excuse for ceramics wastage; your skin..._glows_."

"Thanks, but I just want to take a bath, and-"

"That long neck...the line of you... Hyne, you're _porcelain_..." Leon muttered, no longer really listening to her protests as he became absorbed in his work. "Your back goes on forever... You have to be what inspired this angel...you _are_ this angel. Great Hyne, you're why cavemen stopped wall chiseling and starting wall painting...!"

"Alright, cut me a break," Aeris replied, blushing from the compliments sent her way. As she watched him earnestly engrossed in getting the right colors, she hesitated. Then, finally, with shy deliberation, she lowered the towel again.

"...that's it..."

* * *

"You said _what!_"  
Pride was suddenly glad he hadn't started on dinner when Cid started explaining, or whatever went down his throat would have found its way back up. Now, he had lost his appetite.  
"Damn it, Highwind, if I didn't need you to maintain the airship on the way back to Traverse Town, there'd be pieces of you in twenty different dumpsters come morning."

"See, _you_ can talk about it rationally."

"_Rationally!_ I'm old enough for Ms. Gainsborough to qualify as my _granddaughter_, for Hyne's sake! That was the most _disgusting_ idea that must have passed through your head!"

Cid muttered something.

"...I'm scared shitless to ask, but what was that you said?"

Cid repeated it, and the old man looked ready to have an epileptic seizure.

"...let me get this right, you just told a lady you imagined her going steady with a grandfather and two gay men, thus humiliating her three consecutive times in one hour."

"...that sums up the night, yep."

"... Highwind, you should've come with a warning label and a beeping light."

"I said, I didn't mean it... Look, I know I screwed up. I said the wrong thing, and if I hadn't, I'd actually get to thank her properly for having put up with me all this time since she first started delivering food to my shop. Instead, I'm here with you, - no offense - a crusty old man with one foot in the grave, and paying a moron in the bar to push one of the last legal drugs in existence."

Pride sighed helplessly and raised his glass of alcohol in accompaniment to his answer: "What can I do, but drink to that? Cheers."

* * *

"I don't care how you put it; we're being naughty here, pal."

The bath forgotten and the meal but a distant memory, Aeris was now posing for Leon as he viciously attacked the last of the dye. Scattered all over the floor, were metal plates, several of them inlaid with drying dye in shining vibrant expression.

"No, no, this is good; this is very good. I just...this angle isn't right, the chair handle's getting in the way."

Suddenly, with any lack of thought, Leon tossed the metal plate to the floor, dropped the vial just a bit more gently, and then proceeded to haul himself to the floor as well, the chair rolling backward from the force of his shove until it hit the wall with a bump. Dragging himself into a better position, he continued to add color to a lion composed of fire and silver. As he gave its open, roaring jaws a silver lining, he felt something inside him roar as well.

For the first time since he woke up after the incident, he was back at his center.

* * *

I apologize to every single A&C and A&L fan for this, but the fact is that in this story, both men are gay.  
I'm male with a firm grasp on my sexuality, but I'm pretty sure a lady wouldn't fall in love with a gay man. They could become very good friends, but that might just be it. I'm just saying this, so I might have just offended even more people. For that, I apologize again in advance.

**koyuki-san**: Well... Flypipe was the one who created Pride (name and all); he just let me have him in my stories. There's actually a background story for that name which needs fleshing out; I just never got down to working it out.

**Niana Kuonji**: Well, that's the biggest we come to chaos... Sorry. I suck at dance choreography, and they never actually danced in the script, so I let that one slip. At least they got drunk...


	13. The World is Truly Wonderful

**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf.

I'm scared of myself now. I really am.

I let someone help me write this, and now I feel strange looking at it. Apologies for some obvious OOCness, but we both were trying to achieve "really happy Leon". I never figured happy and Leon fit together, but hey, it was inevitable.

Please pardon me, and I hope you'll at least like the chapter.

* * *

The next morning, Cid was awoken by the sound of someone hauling a mattress the floor. As he got up, he found Pride already out of the room, and the mattress set to lean against the wall.

As he was starting toward the bathroom, the door to Leon and Cloud's bedroom swung open, and Cloud came out looking better than he had the other day.

"...did you and he finally get down and make up?"

"Just this morning," Cloud answered, his grin widening. "And now Aeris is my favorite woman in the world for what she did for him last night."

"...what she did for..._what_?"

The next one out was Leon, also in better spirits. Just as Cid was wondering if it was even possible for Leon to smile like that, Leon came up behind Cloud and wrapped an arm around the lower part of his waist.  
"Morning."

"About time you woke up."

"Didn't mean to wake you last night, or not even noticing we had; got too excited."

Cloud ruffled dark brown hair from his advantageous position. "You really needed it; how could I just break the moment?"

The unbelievable grin on Leon's face widened even further as he managed to yank Cloud onto his lap this time, proceeding to wheel both of them toward the kitchen.  
"I love you, you know that?"

Cid turned several shades of red and chased after them.  
"Leonhart! Leonhart, did you just make out with Aeris?"

Both men gave him a strange look, just as Aeris came in with her arms full of hotel soap and shampoo.

"... Sorry, didn't realize she was right there... Well, _did you_?"

"Please tell me you're not starting that again; last night was traumatic enough," Pride grumbled as he served up another plate of toast.  
"But heck, it had to be some good stuff if it's got you three this deliriously cheerful. So what happened, milady? Kids?"

Aeris suddenly looked brighter as she dropped the soap and shampoo into a plastic bag. "Your grandson just gave me what I never knew I needed until last night."

"Don't flatter; you were an angel," Leon countered, making a grab for a slice of toast.

Pride nearly dropped the plate as he looked straight at Leon.

"You two were..."

Leon nodded, biting into the toast.

"And she was..."

He nodded again, chewing.

"And you were..."

Swallowing the mouthful of toast, he nodded a third time as he spoke. "Absolutely."

"Atta_boy_!" Pride suddenly declared proudly, setting the plate down firmly before giving the younger a friendly punch. "Those pictures are going to make _great_ souvenirs!"

"...are all of you speaking in Pig Latin, or is someone going to tell me what was going on?"

"Aeris modeled for Leon's color schemes!" Cloud suddenly blurted out like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "All of them! How many ladies would do something like that? And here I was, thinking we'd _never_ get back into the business!"

"And now you will," Pride spoke up again, also grinning. "Ms. Aeris Gainsborough, _thank you_."

Cloud suddenly noticed Cid's expression and raised a brow in question. "What's up with you?"

* * *

"Grandfather, we have to talk to you."

Pride looked up from cleaning the table at Leon and Cloud, then wiped his hands clean on the dishcloth. "Kids, you can talk to me anytime. In here?"

Leon nodded. After the morning's excitement, he had sobered with the situation. "It may involve the phone."

Catching the cue easily, Leon's grandfather set the dishcloth down and pulled up a chair. "Go right ahead."

* * *

Back out in the living room, Cid was stammering for an apology as Aeris pointedly ignored him while she packed.

"Look, I get why you're angry; it's no snap to explain why I was like...y'know, like that, but let's not do it on the run."

Aeris effectively walked around Cid to drop a few more articles into her suitcase. Undaunted, Cid continued trying to get his words across.

"Come on, we've still got the rest of the day; the lovebirds are going to want to stay, probably ride out to the lake or whatever, so it's a good five hours back; gives us a good chance to take it easy and-"

"We're going back with you," Leon interrupted as he entered the living room, Cloud and Pride just a step behind.

"But what about-"

"We can handle it."

"What are you talking about? You got real problems."

"We know that, but we think we can take this on our own.  
"I'm still going to speak with Laguna, but not today and not for money," Leon continued with a smirk. "Just to finally sort our differences at a properly arranged appointment."

"And all that, from one night with you," Cloud concluded, pointedly at Aeris as he nodded in approval.  
"Aeris, you're a miracle worker."

Aeris laughed. "You're kidding!"

Cid grunted something unintelligible and retreated from the scene.

* * *

Sometime later in the afternoon, they had checked out of the hotel, and were getting ready to leave.

As Pride was prepping the airship to leave the docks, Cid got himself busy making a call.

Sitting in the passenger compartment, Leon handed a metal plate to Aeris.  
"I want you to have this."

Aeris looked down at the angel he had dyed in white and blue with gold lining, and nodded.  
"It's beautiful. Thanks."

At that moment, Cid hung up and returned to the group.  
"Well, your luck is holding. They sublet your place, and you're officially homeless. The recycle people are moving your stuff into another place you can use for now."

"Their names are Sora and Riku," Cloud pointed out automatically, before asking his question. "Another place where?"

Cid shrugged as he sat down. "Does it matter? You co-piloting again, kid, or can I go up there?"

"You go ahead; I'm staying."

Not needing a second invitation, Cid got up again and left the passenger compartment, taking up position next to Pride.

Moments later, the airship lifted off.

* * *

By the time they returned to Traverse Town, it was already night. Between Pride and Cid, they soon had all the luggage out.

"You kids hang in there, okay? I'll drop in for a visit in two weeks, if I'm still alive then."

Cloud exchanged a hug with the older man. "Thank you, Granddad; love you."

"Love you too, kiddo. Good luck and hang tight."  
After releasing the younger man, Pride patted Leon's shoulder, then disappeared back into the airship, the ramp rising after him.

Cid tossed a pair of keys to Cloud and reached for Aeris' bags. "You boys park in my place while I get Aeris a cab."

Beating him to it, Aeris took her own bags. "No need; I'll take a bus."

"I can pay the whole fare, it's fine; why not?"

"Through this trip, you have managed to not only make a nuisance of yourself, but you also made me feel badly about myself. I don't know if I really know you, or want to know you."  
Then she redirected her attention back to the two other men of the group.  
"You have my number."

Cloud nodded. "Thank you for everything...and let him take you home."

"Not this time. See you around."

Then she walked off, shaking her head.

In unanimous unison, Cloud and Leon looked back at Cid, taking in his expression with sympathy.

Then Cid looked back at them.  
"... Don't say a word."

* * *

Later that same night, Cid let his neighbors in through the glass doors that was the entry way to both his shop front and his home.

"I told you to go on in."

Obliging, Cloud took hold of the chair handles and pushed Leon in, Cid following with the bags.

"Look, we've got to get a hold on Sora and Riku; we have to know where we'll be hanging our coats."

"Well...I think you'll have to camp 'em here."

"...what are you talking about?"

Suddenly, a delighted yip interrupted them, and the small brown-and-white furry form of Angelo vaulted towards his favorite people in the world.

Cloud's face immediately broke into a delighted grin as he reached to pick up the little puppy. "I know the feeling, snookums! You feel like your old self again, don't you? Everything's going back to the way it should be! _The whole family is home_!"

Cid promptly blanched.

Cloud looked at the man with much effort not to laugh, and Leon smirked as the puppy was dumped on his lap.  
"You're fun to mess with," he commented.

Cid merely snorted.

It was then that Cloud spotted what looked like one of his favorite sketches.  
"...what's that doing here?"

"Oh yeah, that..."  
Trailing off, Cid beckoned them to follow as he continued to explain.  
"They took your place refurnished; the recycle people managed to grab your personal stuff, and they were supposed to set it up here. It's an extra room, really big, but I never used it. It gets good light; sucks when I want to sleep in..."

The two followed him into a room, and Angelo hopped off Leon's lap as he scampered in.

There, laid out for them in a homely fashion, were their possessions, along with a large, brand new bed that neither remembered owning. Angelo hopped onto that bed, circled once, then settled down, looking back at them.

Cid waved his arm dismissively for the sake of occasion. "Welcome to your new home, boys."

"... Wow," Cloud managed as a reply.

"They did a nice job," Cid commented, also seeing the room for the first time. "Cozy."

Then he was cut off as Cloud reached over and hugged him.

"... I love you, big guy. You overwhelm me."

Cid sighed and ruffled spiky blond hair like a tired parent.  
"I'll tell you, buddy: I'll be the luckiest man alive if that did it for me.  
"Make yourselves comfy."

As Cloud released him, Cid started to exit the room, pausing to pat Leon on the shoulder. Leon took hold of the hand and squeezed it slightly in gratitude.

Nodding his understanding, Cid took his hand back and left them to settle in.

* * *

Believe it or not, we're starting to close in on the ending. I can only hope I do it right without too much procrastination. 


	14. Wrap It Up and Give It Away

**Wonderful World  
**An AU parody inspired by "As Good As It Gets"; beta-read, reviewed and edited by Howling WereWolf.

No, I can't believe how fast I'm writing either. But the end is in sight, and I can't bring myself to just let it go.

* * *

Back home, Aeris sat by the kitchen table surrounded by Tifa and the kids, as she handed out souvenirs and answered questions.

Denzel picked up the metal plate, admiring the engraving. "Wow. Who did this?"

"A friend of mine; I was his model."

"It's real pretty."

"Thank you."

Tifa eventually cut the chatter short as she picked up Aeris' small bag of used clothes. "I'll take care of this for tonight; you look like you need to use the phone."

* * *

Cid lay spread-eagled over the top of his mattress, eyes shut and breaths deep. Angelo, having ventured in for his attention, now settled on his stomach.

Suddenly, there was the sound of a door opening and closing.

Cid barely twitched.

"Where is my _big_, _hairy_ _boy_?"

Cid's eyes promptly snapped open as he sat up quickly in alarm, the puppy rolling off him and onto the bed. It looked up at him and grunted in confusion.

"Angelo? Come here, snookums!"

Cid promptly heaved a very big sigh of relief.

Cloud entered the room, then halted as he realized the situation.  
"Oh. Sorry, I didn't know you were...you know, in bed."

Cid nodded quickly, not looking his way.

"I just thought Angelo shouldn't get too used to sleeping in here..."

It was then that Cid answered with his own defense:  
"Come on, look - the dog's already comfortable."

Both were interrupted by the phone ringing. Cloud looked at Cid, then back at the phone. When Cid did not move to retrieve it, he offered: "Should I get it?"

At another quick nod from Cid, Cloud left the room, a clicking sound the hint that he had picked up the phone. Then his voice carried.

"Hello? ...Hi! ... Yeah, it's me... He took us in... _Yes_... Hold on a second; I'll get him here."

He reappeared at the door and nodded toward the phone. "It's Aeris."

Cid promptly jumped up and swept Angelo into Cloud's arms. "Here - take the dog and go back to your room."

"Sure. Good luck," Cloud replied after him, the puppy snuggled contentedly and sleepily against his chest.

* * *

**_"... Hello?"_** Cid's voice filtered in.

Aeris drew in a deep breath.  
"Yeah...well..."

_**"How you doing?"**_

"... I'm not sure anymore."

_**"That seems like a good choice."**_

"I don't know whether I'm being harsh or sensible."

_**"Maybe both?"**_

"See, there's an example; now I don't know if you're being crazy or trying to be funny."

_**"Go with funny; I like it better than the former."**_

Aeris sighed in exasperation before she replied. "Cid, you don't have to answer everything I say. Just listen to me...alright?"

There was silence on the other end; a consent. Aeris steeled herself before speaking again.

"It's really something that you're looking after Leon and Cloud. And what I said earlier tonight - that was a bad thing to say...and it made me sick to my stomach...and I'd be lying if I didn't say that I enjoyed your company...  
"But the truth is, you do bother me enormously, and I know..._think_...that it may be for the best that I don't have contact with you... Because you're just not ready to have a long term friendship with people, and you're a pretty old guy to not be ready...and I'm not sure I can ignore that.  
"But there were extraordinary kindnesses that did take place... So...thanks for the trip..."

Still silence, and Aeris played with the cord in her awkwardness over that silence.

"Well...bye, then."

_**"Okay if I say something now?"**_

"Go ahead."

_**"I should have danced with you."**_

"... Okay. Goodbye."

"So long."

As Aeris hung up, she could feel the headache that threatened finally coming down upon her.

* * *

Cid was pacing, moving in anxious circles in the same direction over and over again.

After what had to be his three-hundred-and-sixty-fifth circle, he finally made a beeline straight for the door to the newly-furnished bedroom just a door away.

"_Are you gonna come talk to me or not?_" he yelled at the door.

There was the telltale rustling of movement, then an ominous squeaking. Finally, the door swung open to reveal Leon looking up at him. Then Leon came out from the room and closed the door behind him.

"Cloud and the dog are asleep; you'll have to make do."

Cid sputtered, then threw his hands skyward before storming down to his workshop. Leon followed at a safe distance, then stopped to watch him pace some more.

"...aren't you gonna ask me what she said?"

Leon sighed. This was going to be a long night.  
"...fine; what did she say?"

Cid halted long enough to wave his hand skyward again.  
"That I'm a _great_ guy...and that she doesn't want any contact with me."  
That said, Cid resuming pacing.

"So you holler through the door because you're afraid to lose her friendship," Leon concluded.

"Aren't you queers supposed to be sensitive and sharp?"

"Then you tell me."

"I don't know..." in the pause, the pacing quickened.  
"Let me sleep on it...figure it out... Because I'm stuck! She's the one who just walked through my door handing out fliers, and now she's the one backing out on me! Now I'm going nuts!"

"Did you like it that much?"

"It was heck lot better than this," Cid muttered, than glared pointedly in Leon's direction.  
"Look, you, I'm very intelligent. If you're going to give me advice or conversation or consolation or hope, you got to try harder; you can't be the least bit entertaining, then just shut the heck up.  
"I'm drowning here, and you're describing the water!"

Leon met his gaze evenly.  
"And picking on me is supposed to help, how?"

"It has to, or I'm really in trouble."

Leon gave Cid ten counts to calm down before speaking up.  
"Cid Highwind, do you know where you're lucky?"

"Absolutely not."

"You know what's going on here; you know what you want.  
"Don't sleep on it - do something. Don't let it calm down, it'll only get worse."

"Oh, and what do you know?"

"I know more than enough; don't go there."

"Fine... Hey, I'm _charged_ here... But any right-minded person would maul me for showing up at their door this late."

"Then get into your jammies and I'll read you a story," Leon rebutted.  
"You want this friendship, then take this chance. The one thing against you is her logical thinking; the one thing for you is your willingness to humiliate yourself for whatever that means something to you. So go - catch her off guard."

"...okay..."  
The circles ended as Cid made a beeline for the glass doors.  
"Thanks a lot. Here I go."

* * *

Insomnia had left Aeris sitting at the kitchen table, reading some strangely crude romance novel by Melvin Udall. She had never heard of the man before - until now - but his books were supposed to be good. At the moment, she wasn't so sure.

Then there was the briefest sound of the doorbell, so brief she was not certain it was coming from _her_ doorbell. That is, until the same brief sound repeated.

Hesitantly, Aeris set the book down and went to the door. She opened it to see a nervous Cid Highwind standing there.

"... What do you want, Cid?"

"Were you asleep?"

"Really: what do you want?"

"'Cos if you were asleep, I'm sorry; you could be grouchy."

"...grouchy?"

"...'cos of being woken up, and it would make my job impossible; then I wouldn't even try."

"...what job?"

"Were you asleep?"

"Cid, just what is it you want?"

Neither heard the sound of a bedroom door opening, nor did either one notice someone watching them.

Cid finally raised his hands in a pacifying gesture as he beat a retreat.  
"Sorry I woke you; some other time-"

"_I wasn't asleep_. Now tell me what this is about."

Cid breathed a sigh of relief and nodded, more for his own benefit.  
"I had to see you."

"...because?"

"...because I've been tense since we last talked...and I felt better just sitting on the curb in front of your house, than even on the mattress in my home."

Two pairs of eyes widened in surprise by the sincerity, one pair out of view.

"...wait, I'm overstating...maybe not the curb; maybe the inside stairs. I don't want to sit with my feet in the gutter; what does that serve? It only-"

"Cid, _stop_!" Aeris cried out in exasperation.  
"Stop it already! Why can't you be an average Joe? Why can't you be a normal guy? Just once, can't I have a normal friend who doesn't go nuts on me?"

"Everybody wants that, Aeris; it doesn't exist."

Both Aeris and Cid turned and spotted Yuffie standing in the door, grinning from ear to ear as she ducked back inside.

"Sorry; didn't mean to interrupt!"

The bedroom door closed with a "click", and then they were alone again.

Aeris finally gave in.  
"Come on in and try not to ruin the moment by being you."

"Maybe we could live without the wise cracks."

"Maybe we could."

Cid took a step inside, then looked around and stepped back out.  
"It feels a little confined in here; let's take a walk."

"...it's four in the morning; what would people think?"

Cid shrugged. "If you need an excuse, there's a bakery on the corner; it should open soon. That way, no one will care; we'd just be two people who like our rolls fresh from the oven."

"... Okay."

* * *

"Whatever this is, Cid, it's not going to work."

Cid muttered something unintelligible as they stopped walking. After several minutes of tense silence, not much headway had been made.

Finally, he decided to do something about it.

"You know, being out here and walking with you... I'm feeling better already."

"Cid, I don't know what you're trying to say, but the truth is, you don't know me all that well, and I don't know you all that well. I really don't know if this is going to work."

"I'd like for it work; for us to know each other all that well.  
"I've got a proposition: I want to tell you all about what made a man called Cid Highwind. All you have to do, in turn, is tell me all about what made a lady called Aeris Gainsborough."

When she did not answer immediately, he fidgeted, then nodded at a silent decision.  
"While you think about it, I've got a great compliment for you. Just let me talk, this time...  
"... I'm the only one on the face of the earth, that realizes you're one of the greatest women on earth. I'm the only one who appreciates how amazing you are in every single thing you do...in every single thought you have...in how you are with children you took in and cared for like your own...in how you say what you mean, and how you almost always mean what you say, and that's all about being straight and good...  
"... I think most people miss that about you, and I wonder how watch how you bring them fliers and bring them food orders, and never get that they have just met one of the greatest women alive... And the fact that I get that...makes me feel good. About me.  
"...is there a reason to walk out on that?"

Stunned, Aeris shook her head as she recovered her voice.  
"... No; certainly not... I don't think so, no."

Cid's expression was smug as he knew he had succeeded. "So...you'll take up my proposition?"

Aeris smiled as well and nodded this time. "Absolutely."

Across the street, the bakery store came alive as workers turned on lights, opened the door, and prepared for a day of business.

"... Come on. We can talk over some rolls fresh from the oven, and I can tell you about a woman called Sierra..."

* * *

_One year later..._

Leon sat at the workbench to Cid's workshop, the can of red spray paint set down as he looked through the letter he had just received. There, the car he was working with stood, receiving a new artistic design that Cloud had worked out for it.  
While it was nothing like weapon engraving, it felt good for them to earn their keep.

As Leon looked through the letter a second time, he heard Cloud whistle for Angelo. Soon ,the now adult border collie bounded into sight, panting from a good long jog alongside Cloud. As Cloud let the dog off the leash, he noticed Leon's expression.

"...what is it?"

Leon held up the letter for him to see as he grabbed the can and shook it again.

Cloud took a turn to read, and his eyes widened slightly.  
"...he's giving you back the Ragnarok?"

"I don't know what he's up to either."

"Must be a conspiracy we worked out with the boss; you know how anal-retentive Cid gets over late deliveries."

"That's hardly funny," Leon countered, not bothering to hide the smirk that made its way across his face. "Now get that dog away from my paint. And you're supposed to take care of the new signboard."

Cloud picked up the signboard and a hammer before he went outside a second time, the dog following eagerly. As he reached the hole in the ground, he positioned the signboard properly and hammered it into place.

The sign that now read **_H C L Repairs and Paintjobs_**.

With the last strike, Cloud lowered the hammer and studied the sign. Finally satisfied, he went back inside. Angelo remained by the signboard, sniffing it carefully.

And it was this day that ends this story, that was like any other kind of day one liked; the air was cool, but there was no rain. The morning was setting in, but the rising sun's glaring rays weren't hurting anyone yet. It was one kind of day that people loved to go out on, to smell the flowers, watch the birds and just feel happy about living.

Well, most people, anyway.

As Cid came back toward the shop, he spotted Angelo by the signboard, doing something completely different from mere sniffing now. He promptly blanched.

"_Get the hell away from there!_"

* * *

Well...the end!

That's the official final chapter of **_Wonderful World_**. Thank you for hanging around and sticking with me to see this end; it means a lot to me.

Special thanks to Howling WereWolf for beta-reading and editing, Flypipe for the character contribution and tips of advice, JadeGem for her feedback via Howling WereWolf, and all my good reviewers.

**koyuki-san**: Well, here is the final chapter; I hope it, too, is to your tastes.


End file.
